Things you would never say as a gardener

[bikermike]

"no thanks, I have enough compost"

[Jungle Jane]

“Lay the carpets all over my beds,I’ll plant through them”

[nickdub]

"That's bound to grow OK now"

[Small pumpkin]

No thanks I don't need any free plant pot.

[Squingy]

"Put those peelings in the council compost bin."

[Chrissyteacup]

I have enough seeds I don’t need to try any new varieties!

[Jimny14]

You have a never ending supply of rotted manure and I can have as much as I like delivered whenever I like? No thanks.

[burnie]

I prefer stuff from the supermarket.

[Guest]

I like an easy life.

[veggiechicken]

Wish we'd bought the house with the tiny garden, you remember, the one that was completely paved over and was shaded in summer.

[Aberdeenplotter]

Mine's a Guinness. Yeah yeah, it's the wrong thread but I'm just warming up

[Guest]

No, sorry I don't want your free greenhouse, seeds, polytunnel, garden related items, I don't have the space.

[Baldy]

You are giving away some lovely variegrated ivy you say... yes yes, let me take it off your hands to place willy nilly around my garden...

- Have you got any Japanese knotweed by the way, I think it adds a bit of character?

[Guest]

Yes, I can home those slugs and caterpillars. I have some lovely plants to give them.

[veggiechicken]

I really like those tall conifers, going to plant some myself as I hear their quick growing. What were they called? As yes, Leylandii.