Signs you're obsessed with your new allotment...

[Seahorse]

#1 You've lost the use of most of your limbs but think you'll 'just clear one more bit'

#2 You regale complete strangers with tales of today's lottie activity (and fail to spot that they're sidling away from you while looking decidedly nervous)

#3 You know you need to make appointments with several important people to sort out various crucial matters but only want to actually attend if it's raining

#4 You haven't done any housework for a week... and you don't care



Claire

[NOG]

#5 You grow stuff you don't like eating, cos there was a free packet of seeds

[SarzWix]

#6 You go there even when you haven't got specific jobs to do, and just wander round aimlessly with a brew in hand, hoping that an odd weed or two has started growing...

#7 In the school holidays, the mere mention of the word 'allotment' makes the kids groan, and set up a chorus of "not agaaain Mum, can't we go to the cinema/swimming/park?!"

[bubblewrap]

#8 you plant something in winter hoping it will survive!

[Mrs Dobby]

#9 You become adept at putting up second hand salvaged greenhouses, usually by braille (in the dark)!

[jacob marley]

#10 when you sow your first row of Peas 2 days later you scratch down to see if they are germinating jacob

[Hazel at the Hill]

#11 You spend all the time that you are not at the plot on the Grapevine. It's the first thing you do when you get into work in the morning, ditto when you get home in the evening...

[Sue]

12 Any time you're not on the allotment or on the vine, you're reading seed catalogues.
13 Any time you're not on the allotment or on the vine or reading seed catalogues, you're staring at a pile of produce and rifling through the recipes looking for inspiration
14 Any time you're not on the allotment or on the vine or reading seed catalogues or staring at produce you're trying to cram just one more packet of something saved in the freezer
Sue

[bubblewrap]

#15 when you go & see the prices of veg in the supermarket you feel very self satisfied.

[pigletwillie]

#16 despite owning 2 shoe boxes full of seeds, you go and buy MORE.

[Snadger]

* 17 You try and make up recipes for the days pickings.......now what can I do with a cabbage, a red pepper.turnips, shallots and Cape Gooseberries?

[skegblade]

#18 You can't walk past a skip full of rubbish without looking to see if you could use anything it contains

Phil

[carlseawolf]

*19 Getting up at 5 am and having to wait for the sun to come up before you can get down the plot.

*20 Standing outside you shed waiting for the sun to come up!

* 21 Going down the plot early on your other halfs day off. but you don't take them.

* 22 Going to the allotment see leaves or bananna skinns or apple cores on the road and think i'll put that in my compost bin and pick it up / or ask a complete stranger for there hedge trimings

[TonyF]

23. You realise that neighbours are having work done on their house and you immediately decide that you need to take them a bottle of good red wine to trade for the floorboards and roof battens

24. You become obsessed with finding MORE pallets for the garden, composters etc - you can never have too many pallets

25. You realise that you don't actually have an allotment but you treat the garden as tho it is one

26. Friends start asking you for advice about gardening and twenty minutes later you're still explaining the right way to plant (fill in blank)

27. Other friends sort of glaze over and get that far away look when you mention 'the garden'

28. You decide that you best friends are your gardening friends, either in reality or online

[Matt.]

#29 Your car is the permanent home for all your gardening tools. Theres no point taking them out because you'll only have to put them back in tomorrow.