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How to fill your days when retired... ;)

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  • How to fill your days when retired... ;)



    Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting.

    Well, for example, the other day my wife and I went to Taunton and went into a shop. We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a Parking Attendant writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and said, 'Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?' He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. I called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tyres.

    So my wife called him a s**thead. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote.

    Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus.

    We try to have a little fun each day now that we're retired. It's important at our age.
    I was feeling part of the scenery
    I walked right out of the machinery
    My heart going boom boom boom
    "Hey" he said "Grab your things
    I've come to take you home."

  • #2
    Nice one. Made me chuckle
    Bob Leponge
    Life's disappointments are so much harder to take if you don't know any swear words.

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    • #3
      Easy - retire early with bestest partner in the world, sell up in the UK and move to France, get nice house with a huge garden with a terrace from which you can see the sun go down over the historical village in which you live, make friends from across the world (as we had in the UK), find a good GYO site, sit back ..........

      Edit: and get the three most delightful moggie cats that ever entered a life ..........

      Long contented sigh.
      Last edited by TonyF; 25-02-2008, 07:39 PM.
      TonyF, Dordogne 24220

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      • #4
        Retirement beckons, but I have no money!! Free bus pass sounds good, but where could I go? What the hell, when it comes it comes at least I will have time to look after the lottie properly and the garden (if I can still afford the rent on the cottage)

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        • #5
          My problem with when I retire (which won't be for a good while yet!) will be finding enough time to do everything I've put off doing because of lack of time all my working life!
          My Majesty made for him a garden anew in order
          to present to him vegetables and all beautiful flowers.- Offerings of Thutmose III to Amon-Ra (1500 BCE)

          Diversify & prosper


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          • #6
            When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
            With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
            And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
            And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.

            I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
            And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
            And run my stick along the public railings
            And make up for the sobriety of my youth.

            I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
            And pick the flowers in other peoples' gardens
            And learn to spit.

            You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
            And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
            Or only bread and pickles for a week
            And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

            But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
            And pay our rent and not swear in the street
            And set a good example for the children.
            We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

            But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
            So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
            When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

            by Jenny Joseph
            The river Trent is lovely, I know because I have walked on it for 18 years.
            Brian Clough

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            • #7
              Do not go gentle into that good night,
              Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
              Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

              Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
              Because their words had forked no lightning they
              Do not go gentle into that good night.

              Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
              Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
              Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

              Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
              And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
              Do not go gentle into that good night.

              Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
              Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
              Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

              And you, my father, there on the sad height,
              Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
              Do not go gentle into that good night.
              Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

              Do not go gentle into that good night,
              Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
              Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

              Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
              Because their words had forked no lightning they
              Do not go gentle into that good night.

              Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
              Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
              Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

              Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
              And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
              Do not go gentle into that good night.

              Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
              Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
              Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

              And you, my father, there on the sad height,
              Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
              Do not go gentle into that good night.
              Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

              Dylan Thomas
              The river Trent is lovely, I know because I have walked on it for 18 years.
              Brian Clough

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              • #8
                Nice one seahorse, you need fun and laughter at any age

                keep on making days interesting.
                Smile and the world smiles with you

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                • #9
                  BW, the first day I met J at LSE she had the Jenny Joseph poem up on her her notice board. I thought 'now she is interesting if that's what she's planning already' and guess what, she retired with EXACTLY that attitude to life.

                  When she actually got round to retiring I took her to Covent Garden market and bought her a purple scarf and gloves and a red hat - she stood in the middle of the piazza in tears because I also gave her the Jenny Joseph book that the poem came from - I still remembered it after 22 years.

                  And as for rage against the dying of the light - in 1983 I was given 5 years to live, raging is a speciality with me!
                  Last edited by TonyF; 25-02-2008, 08:35 PM.
                  TonyF, Dordogne 24220

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by TonyF View Post
                    And as for rage against the dying of the light - in 1983 I was given 5 years to live, raging is a speciality with me!
                    And long may you continue to rage Tony
                    A garden is a lovesome thing, God wot! (Thomas Edward Brown)

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                    • #11
                      Without wishing to be gloomy - don't keep things for 'when you retire', just in cast you go under a bus tomorrow! None of us know when our bus-moment may be!

                      On a lighter note, when my mother told her friend that I was going to get an allotment, she said with genuine concern. 'if Hazel isn't careful she isn't going to have anything left to do when she retires!'

                      When I retire I will carry on doing all the things that I enjoy doing - with the exception of work.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Seahorse View Post


                        Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting.

                        Well, for example, the other day my wife and I went to Taunton and went into a shop. We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a Parking Attendant writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and said, 'Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?' He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. I called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tyres.

                        So my wife called him a s**thead. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote.

                        Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus.

                        We try to have a little fun each day now that we're retired. It's important at our age.
                        I'm sure I've met the same parking attendant in Taunton
                        Save the earth - it's the only planet with chocolate

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Just for a laugh
                          YouTube - Trigger Happy TV - Traffic Warden + Road Sweeper
                          The river Trent is lovely, I know because I have walked on it for 18 years.
                          Brian Clough

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                          • #14
                            Well I can report that after 18 months of retirement I still can't fit it all in. People who have trouble with retirement are those who have nothing but work in their lives, or feel that their status in life is connected with their job. They tend to fold up completely. Gardeners, on the other hand ...!
                            Whoever plants a garden believes in the future.

                            www.vegheaven.blogspot.com Updated March 9th - Spring

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                            • #15
                              My mum and dad are far busier than they ever were when they worked - playing with their grandchildren!

                              janeyo

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