Thank you for your support in our loss

[Finedon.Dandy]

All your posts yesterday were such a comfort. With each batch I read I had a little cry, each peice of advice was appreciated and I do feel a little better for it.

Some of the posts enquired if we had any other children and yes we have been blessed with a gorgeous little girl who is 4 and a little cheeky monkey of a boy who is 2. This is my third miscarriage; an ectopic between the two kids at 6 weeks and the second was during my daughters 1st week at school, last September, again at 6 weeks. I thought I was past my danger time having nearly got to 12 weeks and was so looking forward to my scan but it just wasnt tyo be.

We have now been trying for a third for over a year now and with my age creeping ever nearer to 40, I am getting a wee bit concerned we wont be any further blessed. How people cope with repeat miscarriages and never having that longed for first child is beyond me. I am well into the healing process but want to wait a couple of months before we resume our quest. I know when we do start our next journey, my grape family will be behind us every step of the way and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for being there in such a positive way.

I am a crafter so have plenty to keep me occupied - I have 500 butterflies to make for my sisters wedding invitations by September. Now is the time of year though that I am obbsessed with the garden so in fair weather I want to be out there. All the potting on is up straight (I can do that without bending) but other jobs will have to wait for hubby to do at the weekend. Perhaps the pains will have subsided by next week and I can get back into it. I know some of you will soon tell me off if my posts indicate I am overdoing it - hubby is counting on that!

Thanks again

Tammy

[Flummery]

Glad we could help Tammy. Take it easy though!

[janeyo]

It will help to take comfort from your children, they are so innocent and full of fun at those ages!

Take it slowly and easy and do as much as you think you can but don't overdo it.

Thinking of you, janeyo

[jackie j]

I havent had any miscarriages and had my first son at 24 years and had more, then when I was 40 I remarried and at 41 had a daughter as I said in my other thread about this my sister was 44 before she had her first baby after 2 miscarriages so dont give up keep trying when you are ready, in the meantime dont overdo things take it slowly.
My mum was 42 before she had me it must run in my family to have children later in life.
Love and hugs.

[bluemoon]

My eldest daughter lost a much longed for baby last autumn, what made it worse was her sister had her second baby a few days later. This was the first time my daughter had even managed to become pregnant, after years of trying, so it all seems so desperately unfair for her - especially as number three daughter is also now expecting and no-one has yet dared mention it in front of the eldest, I really don't know how we are going to tell her. Keep well FD, I hope everything turns out for the best for you.

[areia]

there are 2 people in my life who so deperatly want kids the first my cousin was told she had emniodemetriosis (where the lining of the womb grow outside and attatches to the intestines etc )and was told she could never have children, she never really wanted kids but when you have the choice taken away from you it makes you change your mind. Haveing had painful hips and 2 laser treatments to remove the lining was told last year after 8 years of suffering, she can have children, (this being she was rushed to hospital in pain to be told she was having a miscarriage ) this was upseting but also hopfull for her now she is having fun in trying instead of stressfully trying, the second is a freind who fell pregnant at 15 and decided to abort as she was too young from which she had 6 miscarriages since and was blaming herself so hard as she felt she was being punished for the termination she did at 15 happily she is now pregnant expecting her first child at 28

you are bless with 2 beautiful children, as they say if it was ment to be it was ment to be,
i wish you all the luck in the future for more, i would just say let your body have time to repair itself both mentaly and physically, before rushing in again.
all the best

[SueA]

Really sorry for your loss Tammy, I haven't been online for a couple of days & have only just read this. It must be heartbreaking for you all. As some of the others have said though you're still young enough in today's world to try for more children if that's what you want, my mum was 43 when she had me! Take it easy until you feel well but a little bit of planning & seed sorting etc. might occupy your mind a little. Take care.

[Novice Gardener]

I read your thread yesterday, and my heart went out to you, but being new on here, I didn't feel I should post as I thought I might be intruding. Like you I've miscarried 3 times, but am lucky to also have 3 healthy children. Like others have said, its important you let your body repair itself, and focus your energy on getting well, both physically and mentally. You'll know when/if the time is right to try again.x

[Finedon.Dandy]

Novice Gardener

I am so much newer than you on here!....... I think it really says something about this forum that I felt I could share my grief with all the grapes, even though I am in effect a newbie.............. I dont think you have that on here - ok so there are those who have a wicked sense of humour and it can sometimes mean a ribbing between members who have been on here since prehistoric times and know each other so well they feel they can get away with it (humour is often beyond me!) but even if you are new you are not made to feel that way. (pats all the grapes on the back _ _ _ _ _ _ )

Thanks yet again for everyones words - I love being a little grape on this flourishing vine.

Tammy