Sharing a plot but I'm doing all the work

[amandaandherveg]

I really just need a bit of a moan, so bare with me.

I have a lovely elderly, widowed neighbour who was struggling to do her large garden. My friend and I offered to take over half of it, tidy it up and grow veg. My neighbour was delighted as the state of it was really depressing her, bless.

Anyhow, a couple of months on and it seems to be me thats done all the work, supplied the wood for borders, got my OH to do 2 trips to pick up chuckies from a Freecycler, provided all the plants and seeds, built a raised bed and has to do all the weeding and tidying as she never appears when we've arranged a gardening session. She just called to cancel again. She's not bothered in 6 weeks.

I'm really hacked off.

Has anyone else shared a plot or allotment with anyone that just doesn't want to do the work but will be quite happy to take the produce? What did you do?

[doozer]

A problem aired...

...is a problem shared. So are your problems really your problems - or just half of someone elses!?

Anyway, I seem to remember some fable about a chicken, a field,some grain and a loaf of bread. Oh, and a load of unwilling helpers. Do you know it?

Anyway, the point I believe is...when it comes to harvest time, the one who's worked the hardest gets the reward. So whilst I'm sure it's tough...you can gloat at how wonderful all this lovely fresh fruit and veg is...but will there be anyleft for those who don't bother to come?

I hope that makes you feel better.

[amandaandherveg]

I know she'll turn up when there's veg to pick. I'm a miserable cow today!

[Mikey]

No, but then I would have been reluctant to share in the first instance, unless it meant clearly defined areas. I would just say, its ok if you are not able to help with the garden, I understand sometimes we get into things with all good intentions but find it inconvenient in practise. Look I'll help you out and take over the whole area, hows that.

Perhaps your neighbour doesn't know how to tell you that, they cannot commit the time, and feels guilty for not helping. If you clear the air all will be better I'm sure.

[amandaandherveg]

It's not my neighbour, she's given my friend and I half the garden, it's my friend that agreed to share the area/work/produce with me that keeps not turning up. My neighbour is lovely.

[Mikey]

It's not my neighbour, she's given my friend and I half the garden, it's my friend that agreed to share the area/work/produce with me that keeps not turning up. My neighbour is lovely.

Ok, in which case it should be easier to tell your friend they are not pulling their weight, and will not be reaping any bounty!

[amandaandherveg]

I can see us playing tug of war over a courgette at this rate, lol.

[Mikey]

Its only fair really, if they are not helping you with the work, and you know that for a fact, then they can hardly expect to benefit from the fruits of your efforts. I would suggest, you stop asking her to come and give you a hand.

[zazen999]

Take one courgette round to hers to save her the trip as she's too busy.

Honestly, some people are take take take.

[Headfry]

Oh it's a hard one.

I would say that as she obviously does not have the time then you will go it alone!

At least what you do will be all yours!

I get caught out like this so many times that I now just try to do things on my own.
yes it can be hard work, but then I dont get angry over someone not pulling their weight, I really don't like being angry with people at all.

[Pootle]

We share our allotment with a friend - but we have clearly defined beds which we 'own' and the other doesn't touch unless specifically asked ie: during holiday times. Perhaps you should just say to your friend 'my half of the plot is looking great' and leave her to ponder!

Sorry I can't come up with anything more practical

[MaureenHall]

Plot sharing

I'm in a similar position. When my neighbour (friend) and I found out that the old allotment site was being re-openend, we agreed to apply for half a plot and share the work and produce. Silly me!!! In the 6 - 7 weeks we've had it, she's been over once (it's 30 seconds away from our houses) to see what needs to be done and what I've already done. Now I get the "I can't bend to do planting" "I can't dig" "I can hoe out the weeds, but I'm not well this week" etc, etc. She's a nice lady though (I know, I'm gullible)and I feel sorry for her. However, she's younger than me (only by a couple of months) gets more pension than me (don't know how!) and has a son at home who does loads of jobs for her. I live alone so if a job needs to be done, I'm the one to do it. I give her a basket of veggies from my garden each week, a few eggs here and there, and this week she's had gorgeous lollo rosso lettuces from the lottie. I wonder if this worm can turn and I'll be selfish enough to keep all (or nearly all) the produce from the lottie for myself In her defence though, she did buy a couple of little sunflower plants to put near the shed "to brighten it up a bit"
I'm moaning aren't I?????????? anyway, feel better now for putting my feelings into words. Thanks for reading this

[Flummery]

My shared lottie is strictly - this is my half, this is Ali's half. This works!

[rogesse]

I don't really 'share' my allotment but have given over a couple of beds to a single dad friend with a little girl mad on gardening but with no garden of her own.

He'd rather lean on a spade and chat to everyone but with a bit of nagging he does the best job of double digging.

I'm off on my hols for a couple of weeks; taken to the airport (6 days and counting), my plot, 'greenhouse' (big plastic tent thing), houseplants and albino frogs all taken care off - in exchange for a bit of soil, seeds and babysitting, oh and a bottle of brandy

He is also actively encouraged to pick what he wants to avoid glut and waste - the allotment easily feeds all of us, three of me, two of him!

With regard to your grasshopper situation (Aesop, I think), be greedy and give what you can't use to friends and family or indeed your lovely neighbour.

On the other hand, I love sharing what I've grown and am flattered when asked for more - I've also had the pleasure of growing from seed to table. I'd certainly lay on 'it was hard work work but so worth it, aint I clever'....with a trowel

[amandaandherveg]

Just back in. Went out to our shared garden and weeded, planted, thinned out, dead headed, etc for 5 hours and feel great now, amazing how a bit of fresh air and a bit of gardening makes everything better.

The caulis have curds, courgettes and squash are swelling, leeks are fattening up, broccoli have heads, there are tiny and the red and white cabbages are starting to 'heart up'. Yippee!

Next time I'm a miserable bint I'll prescribe myself a couple of hours of hard garden graft.