Another set of truths

[Stacey Steve]

How to Make a Woman Happy

It's not difficult to make a woman happy....
A man only needs to be:

1. A friend
2. A companion
3. A lover
4. A brother
5. A father
6. A master
7. A chef
8. An electrician
9. A carpenter
10. A plumber
11. A mechanic
12. A decorator
13. A stylist
14. A sexologist
15. A gynecologist
16. A psychologist
17. A pest exterminator
18. A psychiatrist
19. A healer
20. A good listener
21. An organizer
22. A good father
23. Very clean
24. Sympathetic
25. Athletic
26. Warm
27. Attentive
28. Gallant
29. Intelligent
30. Funny
31. Creative
32. Tender
33. Strong
34. Understanding
35. Tolerant
36. Prudent
37. Ambitious
38. Capable
39. Courageous
40. Determined!
41. True
42. Dependable
43. Passionate
44. Compassionate
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:


45. Give her compliments regularly
46. Love shopping
47. Be honest
48. Be very rich
49. Not stress her out
50. Not look at other girls
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

51. Give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. Give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. Give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:

54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

1. Show up naked
2. Bring food

[HayleyB]

You're so right SS - men are so shallow

[Stacey Steve]

I like to think of us realistic and to the point.

[maytreefrannie]

So it takes 54 steps to make a woman happy and 2 things only are needed to make a man happy?

Ah but Steve - I take it those two things are non-negotiable?

[Stacey Steve]

Don't know, never happened yet but Ahh dream on!

[Two_Sheds]

Steve, that's a long list. I would settle for a man just to be human (they seem to be from another planet most days ... I wasn't thinking of Mars either)

[Glutton4...]

How to Make a Woman Happy

It's not difficult to make a woman happy....
A man only needs to be:

1. A friend - yes
2. A companion - yes
3. A lover - when he's not snoring!
4. A brother - yes
5. A father - No kids, so forget that one
6. A master - of what?
7. A chef - yes, and qualified (and hence my weight problem!)
8. An electrician - no, but his Dad is!
9. A carpenter - No chance - he can't weld wood!
10. A plumber - Er... Naaah..
11. A mechanic - yes, current employment
12. A decorator - not a cat in h*ll's chance!
13. A stylist - It's his own unique style!
14. A sexologist - Couldn't even spell it!
15. A gynecologist - Who'd want to be married to one of those???????????
16. A psychologist - Naaah - he's male!
17. A pest exterminator - Yup
18. A psychiatrist - See 16 above
19. A healer - No, just shuts it out
20. A good listener - You gotta be jokin!
21. An organizer - Couldn't organise a piece of paper
22. A good father - See 5 above
23. Very clean - Only when he gets outta the bath
24. Sympathetic - Only when he's ill
25. Athletic - OK, he can do that one, but it's censored!
26. Warm - If the heating's on
27. Attentive - When he wants something
28. Gallant - Couldn't even spell it
29. Intelligent - Obviously - he married me (ROFSMAL)
30. Funny - Yup (seen 'im nekkid!)
31. Creative - See 25 above
32. Tender - Bruises easily!
33. Strong - Useful for carrying things for me!
34. Understanding - If he wants to be
35. Tolerant - See 34 above
36. Prudent - See 34 above
37. Ambitious - Yup ()
38. Capable - Definitely
39. Courageous - See 29 above
40. Determined! - Yup
41. True - to himself
42. Dependable - to a fault
43. Passionate - See 3 above
44. Compassionate - Cries at sad films!
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:


45. Give her compliments regularly - He's given up but I don't blame him!
46. Love shopping - Sad Git does - I hate it
47. Be honest - No complaints so far
48. Be very rich - Ah, got that one soooooooooooo wrong!
49. Not stress her out - Hummmmmmmmmmmmm
50. Not look at other girls - He wouldn't be human now, would he?
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

51. Give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself - We're about equal there
52. Give her lots of time, especially time for herself - Ditto
53. Give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes - Ditto
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:

54. Never to forget:
* birthdays - They don't do this - that's what we're for!
* anniversaries - Ditto
* arrangements she makes - Ditto

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

1. Show up naked - They'd just pi** themselves laughing!
2. Bring food - No need, they can do that!

Wouldn't swap 'im for the world!


And, yes, I do like the exclamation mark!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[NOG]

If you are bringing food I couldnt care if you were nude or female.

[HayleyB]

Glutton, one word - brilliant

[Hilary B]

Men know what they want, and can't understand why women want something different.
Women know what men want, and can't understand why a man can't be more understanding.....

[squashysu]

All i can say is "QUALITY" SS - made my Sunday lol