Clear Out

[jackie j]

Earlier in the year I said I needed to have a big clear out and I made a start, I gave all my knitting machine bits and bobs to my daughters school, I gave some clothes to charity, I have been to a couple of car boot sales, and sold my daughters bike at the weekend as well as some other toys and daughters clothes. My OH hasnt got rid of any thing not one thing, I look at every thing in our house and its just a complete mess, every room bar the sitting room is full of junk. We have four bedrooms, we only use two, the other two have got loads of stuff in, one I made into a craft room but dont really do anything in there now and its where I want to put a new bathroom when we can afford it. We have a sitting room, a dinning room, a breakfast room, kitchen and bathroom. The dinning room is OH domain and where the computer is, as well as an old table, two units and junk, the breakfast room has table full of ironing, chairs, a built in cupboard with my pickles etc in and toys and junk.
There is also a very large airing cupboard in with lots of stuff including very old blankets that I have kept to use in the garden for the kids to sit on.
Well I have had enough and am going to clear out a load of junk starting today and if they dont like it TOUGH. I am embarased when anyone comes in the house and dont invite many people in, my OH never finishes any decorating. We need to do the hallway and take out the horrible downstairs loo its right inside the front door.
Where do I start, our bedroom is more like a storage place, OH colects china cats and they are all in boxes in fold up crates in the bay window. He used to keep tools under the bed till I banned them, I want a bedroom, somewhere I can relax.
How do others get rid of things and dont hoard ' just in case ' they might be useful.

[lynda66]

we change the locks ...... so OH can't get in, then put everything in black bags on the doorstep ....... and don't open the door till at least half the stuff has gone

either that, or get a load of boxes, put everything in, then put them up in the loft ....... i have no idea whats in my loft any more lol ..... parents brought boxes of stuff when they emigrated ....... every now and then i'll get a box out and go through it ...... the rest just stay there till i can be bothered

with that loft/spare room you can't be accused of chucking things, but everything is at least tidy in boxes in one room ...... labelled very carefully as to whats in it ...... so then if your OH wants anything .... he can't say he can't find it, cos it's on a label on the lid

[jackie j]

Forgot to say loft has loads in it as well. We keep the large boxes of any thing for a while, then there is all the camping stuff up there as well, and as my OH moved into my house most of his stuff went up there and gradually we get things out to use when mine breaks. That was 14 years ago.

[lynda66]

nothing for it but changing the locks then

then all you can do i reckon is put loads of stuff you want rid of, in a box, each week hand one box to OH and say, i'll be chucking that box out on bin day, so you best go through it and see if theres anything you want to keep ..... then on bin day, chuck it out if he doesn't go through it, that's not your fault

[ailsasyl]

I am not a hoarder, if I haven't used it or plan to use it it goes either to charity or the dump when I get new furniture old goes usually to the dump as its not fit for re-use.
You have to be strict with yourself, I tend to have a clear out of HB's room before Xmas to make way for new stuff, it must be rubbing off as she's said there is stuff she needs to get rid of Don't get me wrong I am not the best at housework, the house is often in a mess, especially as I'm still working on it, as I'm on my on DIY is down to me so it gets done although slowly, have doors to finish before Xmas. When I was married other half would start and not finish jobs, hence me up a ladder wallpaper our room at eight months pregnant, we'd had the wallpaper for about nine months!!

I start in one room sort it then move to another, usually I start downstairs as visitors see this first and most of the junk ends up upstairs, sort to piles, keep to go elsewhere in house, charity, rubbish. When I do HB's room I make sure she's there for the day, so she can say what she wants to keep and get rid of, sometimes there is compromise
You'll feel better once its all done.

[Flummery]

We both hoard! We gave loads to a charity shop when we came here 9 years ago. Yesterday a couple of plasterers came and took down the spare bedroom ceiling (previous owners had had a roof leak, fettled the roof, botchily patched and papered over the ceiling.) There was no way I was going to strip painted paper off a ceiling that was a damned disgrace in the first place! This meant that we had to spend some time last weekend moving (and chucking!) a lot of the loft stuff and then rolling back the insulation so he didn't get the whole lot down on his head! Very cathartic, a good chuck-out. The principle was that if we hadn't needed it in 9 years we either wouldn't need it at all or - thingie's law - we'd need it next week. We took the chance!

[FionaH]

Reading your post made me smile Jackie! At least I know Im not alone. Hubby is part bleedin squirrel. Take it very slowly, even doing a room at a time is daunting when thers that much stuff. I would suggest picking one area and starting with that. Best of British.

Tip: if he gets huffy sneak stuff to the wheelie bin when hes out
By the way I think it should be made illegal not to finish decorating, none finished here either!

[Rhona]

Oh God I'm the worst hoarder in the world. DH is just about to throw out the rubbish in an attic bedroom that I've 'collected.' The rest of the house is fine - I only fill one area with my stuff, but he rightly points out that most of it is stuff that I moved in with five years ago, is still in boxes, and I've never so much as looked at it.

I've bravely said that he can just chuck the lot, and THEN he said 'well you'd better check in case there's anything you want to keep.' GAH!

Actually, I also have one cabinet drawer that I keep my treasure in too... and I've always claimed that it's 'stuff I really need.' Then DH took a peek and found (among other things) an old Barbie doll, a Japanese Calligraphy set and various unopened perfumes. So, anyway, yes, I'm a hoarder...

[Nicos]

Buy a pile of bin bags and load them up with similar stuff..bedding/clothes..books/toys...ornaments...shoes/belts and then phone a few charity shops just outside your area and see what they'll take..then donate them...you'll be surprised how many people are shopping for Xmas gifts- or just basic needs -at charity shops.
You get rid of your rubbish , the charity wins, and so does the person who buys your unwanted stuff.
I wouldn't chuck out your OH's stuff...I'd be REALLY hurt if my OH did that to me.
Make 3 piles of his/joint stuff...'keep', 'his second opinion', and 'chuck'.... and have a serious chat about why you're doing this. Once overfaced with having to go through it all with the 'second opinion' pile , he may prefer to poke his eye out with a pencil rather than go through the 'chuck' pile!!!!!

Alternatively sell on e-bay- or get a trusty teenager to do it for you on a 50:50 profit basis.

Good luck!!!!

( and yes..I'm the hoarder in my family)

[lynda66]

freecycle is also good for getting rid of stuff as well as the charity shops, or for the stuff the charity shops won't take.

[kirsty b]

Steve and I are both hoarders, but are getting better at chucking stuff out. Every 6 mths or so I will go through both of our clothes and have a sort out. If its stained or misshapen, it get turned into car washing rags, anything decent gets bagged up for the charity shop if it hasn't been worn for a year.
When we decorated the living room a couple of years ago, we completely cleared it (had to as we were putting new flooring down) and only brought in stuff we really wanted to keep. Quite a lot got chucked. Did the same when spruced up kitchen, went through cupbaords and had a sort out.
Daughters bedroom gets a thorough clear out about twice a year, any toys that have bits broken/missing get thrown. Any stuff still in good condition gets freecycled/charity shopped.
I have got a massive box of photos that I plan to scan and save to micro SD card at some point.
I do have about 3-4 boxes of treasures dotted about, but they are due to be repacked into tough plastic boxes and stored in the loft.
Steve has the garage for all his crap, but he will have a good clear out 3-4 times a year and will get rid of masses of stuff. Recently he got hold of some old kitchen cupboards from a neighbour for the garage, and it stays much tidier in there now.
We have both had to learn how to clear out, as it does not come naturally for either of us

[jackie j]

Over the years its been my stuff that has got chucked cos in his opinion its cheap and most of the time he has been right lol. The reason why we have two units in the dinning room is because I dont like his and want rid and he doesnt like mine and wants rid, cant afford new so keep both, mine is over 30 years old his isnt far behind.
Well I have made a start and cleared out most of the airing cupboard and tided up towels etc, I hate an untidy airing cupboard. What can I do with the couple of blankets ? they are no good for charity but might make a good animal blanket.
I have gone through the cupboard where I have put my pickles and have taken out the toy games and as I have a grandson and great nieces and nephew I will keep them but move them to upstairs and find a shelf to put them on.
When OH comes home I am going to make him go through all the books he has that he never looks at and his old records that never get played and as I am doing another car boot on sunday thats where they will go.
I feel good already musnt stay here too long or nothing else will get done.
I am determined this time that by christmas our house will be tidy and not look like Steptoe and son's house !!!!! as it does now.

[snuffer]

Collecting and hoarding tends to be a 'man thing'. We just can't help ourselves. You may declutter but given time we will fill up the available space. How many people do you know who keep their car in the garage? I don't know anyone. Why? Because the bloke of the house has filled it with 'might come in handy one day' stuff.

I have a theory that all men are slightly autistic. Autism, especially the asperger end of the spectrum, could just be called 'ultra manness'. The need to collect is deep seated, you'll never stop us.

[jackie j]

We dont have a garage so no excuse there.

[lynda66]

We dont have a garage so no excuse there.

maybe a good job, as that would probably be full too

try the local animal charity for blankets, will be xmas dog dumping season soon then kitten and puppy season , and they often are looking for stuff ....... our vets has an RSPCA collection box that you can put stuff in, as do a lot of supermarkets round christmas.