Gardeners Rest #15 (2020)

[Snoop Puss]

...for the Tardis to return.

"Won't you come home, Bill Bailey, won't you come home?" sang Nicos as loud as she could in the finest Madame Edith style.

[Nicos]

....not quite hitting the top C , and wibbly wobbling around the C flat and B sharp ,her musical talent was certainly one to remember.....

[Snoop Puss]

The genies knew a true wish when they heard one and began to breathe in and out at the same time, shifting a huge volume of air with every intake...

"Duck", shouted most of the Grapes. "Where?" cried Rary, roused from his eye inspecting. "Get down", sang Nicos, realising a more straightforward command was required.

[burnie]

all the genies started to sing loudly hoping to save our ears, but this might be one wish too far even for them, though they blew all the dust from the beams in the pub making it look like it was snowing inside and............................

[Snoop Puss]

then they inhaled in unison.

The Gardeners' Rest was a sight to behold. Caught in a cloud of whirling snow that suddenly disappeared to reveal a sparkling, shiny, good-as-new Gardeners' Rest with the decorations and tree still in place. Even the fairy perched on top, hugging the star.

Somewhere, in the distance, the Grapes heard the vworp, vworp of the Tardis, sucked back through time by the genies, who had now disappeared, their work done.

"Duck!" shouted some of the Grapes who had not yet learned from Nicos's example. "Where?" cried Rary, who was by now fed up of the whole rigmarole.

"Get behind the bar", shouted Burnie.

"Good idea", Lumpy said and everyone piled in behind her, even Hector, though his head wouldn't quite fit, so he stacked up a load of the glasses that Burnie had filled earlier in the hope they would act as a barrier. Though his hopes were dashed when everyone started drinking up.

The vworping got closer and closer. Accompanying it, the Grapes could just hear the tapping of feet...

[Nicos]

....but as it got louder everyone realised it was the malfunctioning tappets needing a darned good oiling in the Tardis - or an exhaust manifold leak - or both! ......as it came in for a crash land

Burnie grabbed his tin of WD40 just in case, Snadge grabbed the fire extinguisher and rary grabbed the duck.....

[Nicos]

...just as the warp in Space Time Continuum gently lifted the Tardis gently into landing position....

[Nicos]

Trying not to spill her medicinal hot toddy, Janie rushed over and opened the Tardis door and everyone started to cheer!...

[greenishfing]

,...........as Bill Bailey waltzed out in all his glory!!!

[Nicos]

Greenishfing grabbed her butterfly wings she’d made from recycled Quality Street wrappers and Moonwalked her way towards him ( well - it HAD recently been a full moon after all)...

Fluttering and a-quivering her wings , Bill was speechless...” ooo errr Mrs “ was all he could come out with....he was mesmerised by her beauty and skills.....

[Snoop Puss]

The fairy looked on in amazement. What was she to make of this shimmering vision? Competition? An ally? Someone she could swap places with?

The Grapes were distracted by the sight of GF flirting with Bill - for there was no other way of putting it - that they didn't notice...

[greenishfing]

........coming in to land ........from a distant galaxy......

[Nicos]

Was the millennium Falcon, piloted by none other than Yoda himself

[Nicos]

"Pleased to see you I am" he smiled.
"I've come to train you in the Jedi Ways to help see you through the next few weeks....the training is easier these days...just form a circle and hold hands"

At this, greenishfing and Bill automatically started to dance the Hokey Cokey , Burnie and rary started to sing Auld Lang Syne, swinging their arms up and down with great gusto....spilling some of Janie's hot toddy....

Yoda calmly rolled his eyes and suddenly a warm light began to glow in the centre of the circle....

[burnie]

as he said " repeat after me, never sow root crops where you've put in manure"........................................