i didn't expect to be spending xmas in a stable

[lynda66]

well at least evryones stopped ringing me to tell me how much money i owe the ....... they cut the phone off lol ........ i'm just sick of it all, our CAB is only open wednesday, but i'll try sort it then ...... at least Robs coming home tonight so i can get a hug ...... thing is i know he's gonna want to pay the stuff, but then that's gonna leave him in a mess cos i can't afford to pay him back ....... i'm honestly trying to keep going it's just this ones the last straw.

[willowstar]

Hi Lynda, I know that horrible sinking feeling when financial problems swallow you up and you can't see the way through, I have been there and suffered badly because of it. I know it is really difficult but you have to take it one step at a time, open up the letters because they aren't going to go away, put everything into neat piles and take it all with you to the CAB. You will have to phone up everyone you owe money to, but I found that mostly if I showed willing and paid just a little they gave me some breathing space. You WILL get through this. I am kind of through the other side now and I always open letters up. I sometimes have to ask my OH to be with me when I do it (really silly I know!) but it is a habit i have had to force myself into because of all the troubles I have had in the past.

You will get this sorted, please please don't despair.

[SueA]

Try not to get down Lynda, as the others say there is help out there (somewhere!) & as most of the problems have not been your fault you shouldn't have to suffer, give 'em some stick!

[Nicos]

I know you must feel very fed up Lynda, but there is, I think, very little you can do between now and Monday until you see the CAB .

One very helpful and positive thing you CAN do is write down exactly what has happened and when- list/diary form, so when you come to explain what's been going on and when, you will have a very clear- and precise - detailed account of the last few months. You can leave copies with each person you need to speak to so there can be NO misunderstanding.

Perhaps an ombudsman might be worth approaching- perhaps the CAB can advise /direct you there????

The detailed list will be exceptionally helpful to you as there can be no more misunderstanding by the others involved- also when you're upset ( well this would be the case with me) peeps become less articulate and focused.
The rest of the weekend- well..you know we are here- contact/meet up with your boyfriend and son -and most of all be proud of yourself Lynda...we know you're lovely and caring and thoughtful, and we're very pleased to have 'met'you

I was just getting all upset about a door knob being put on the wrong place on a brand new door which will now leave it with an obvious hole in it...puts things into perspective really don't it

Pecker up n all that chum xx

[nkp1962]

Lynda

have a look at the forums on Consumer Action Group, you may find some help & advise there.

Try not to let it get you down too much - easy words to say I know, but....

NKP

[piskieinboots]

One very helpful and positive thing you CAN do is write down exactly what has happened and when- list/diary form, ....

This is excellent advice Lynda, it will help you to feel in/regain control. Turn away from the pooter screen and get your pad and pen out gal

[lynda66]

bloody hell ...... i don't even know what day it is half the time lol never mind 3 months ago

[lynda66]

thanks you lot, you are wonderful ..... i know i'll get it sorted eventually, just goot a bit much for me today xxxx

[piskieinboots]

rightio - stop clocking up these posts (top poster award for you!) and get writing ... we'll still be here when you turn back to pooter

[kate&rob]

it's just not what you need at this time of year, or anytime of year is it. hope you get things sorted, i'm sure you will with all the good advice on here. you will get through this as difficult as it may seem. i've had troubles too, there is always light at the end of the tunnel, just try and stay possitive. thoughts are with you.

[sallym]

Lynda. I have been there ( only OH knew this before now, hope no relatives on here). It used to make me feel so sick when the post came every day or when the phone rang. Always more bad news. It really does take some doing ( I just wanted to ignore it and hope it would go away) but start the ball rolling over the w/end and phone the people you owe money to and explain. Most have phonelines open over the w/end. Once I started to do this most came up with some sort of repayment plan. I still owe this money, but now I can afford to pay it off in smaller payments and actually have reduced my bank overdraft. Its a horrible position to be in, but it feels a lot better when you realise that you can at last cope. I really know how you feel, and if you fancy a chat or a rant PM me.
Take care

[rustylady]

problem is it's the second eviction notice i've had cos of the cock ups last time ..... because of how long it took them to sort out the housing benefit, the eviction was ready to go to court when they paid it ....... just so bloody fed up, it's one thing after another at the moment ...... i already have a DLA appeal going on and have a big pile of mail that i really daren't open going back the last 6 months cos i haven't been able to pay stuff ........ and yup i messed up when i got the back pay, and went and bought food and gas and leccy instead of paying the bills ........ i'm just so fed up of it all ...... being honest i've just suddenly lost the desire to cope any more ....... feel like giving up

Please open the mail!! I know it's scarey but it needs to be done. Citizens Advice Bureaux are absolutely brilliant at sorting out debt problems. You need to be completely honest with them, and they will contact your creditors and make offers of payment (minimal amounts - if you're on Income Support very minimal) you just must keep to the agreed payments. Creditors suddenly become much more reasonable and less threatening when they're dealing with the CAB instead of little old you. Regarding the Income Support, contact your local Welfare Rights office, we have a local guy who is absolutely brilliant.

[BarleySugar]

Lynda, you said your CAB isn't open until Wed? In the meantime why not try the Consumer Credit Counselling service (CCCS) if you have debts besides the rent? They help with advice on loans and credit cards if you've got in a hole, although I don't think they deal with rent etc. They are a charity who can help you set up a debt management plan, contact all your creditors, who in most cases will freeze interest and accept lower payments. My sister is with these people, and she found it such a relief to have someone deal with it for her. Many creditors are very willing to negotiate with the CCCS as they are a reputable charity, she pays what she can afford to the CCCS each month, and they pay a pro rata amount to each of the creditors. She doesn't need to pay each one individually. They will be be able to advise you on the best course to take, for her it was a DMP, but they also talked to her about IVA and bankrupcty options, and are available from 8am Monday, I looked up the link for you CCCS - Contact Us
There have been no letters or phone calls for ages, which has reduced her stress levels and she has been a different person even though she has a tough budget to follow.

[MaureenHall]

Lynda, you said your CAB isn't open until Wed? In the meantime why not try the Consumer Credit Counselling service (CCCS) if you have debts besides the rent? They help with advice on loans and credit cards if you've got in a hole, although I don't think they deal with rent etc. They are a charity who can help you set up a debt management plan, contact all your creditors, who in most cases will freeze interest and accept lower payments. My sister is with these people, and she found it such a relief to have someone deal with it for her. Many creditors are very willing to negotiate with the CCCS as they are a reputable charity, she pays what she can afford to the CCCS each month, and they pay a pro rata amount to each of the creditors. She doesn't need to pay each one individually. They will be be able to advise you on the best course to take, for her it was a DMP, but they also talked to her about IVA and bankrupcty options, and are available from 8am Monday, I looked up the link for you CCCS - Contact Us
There have been no letters or phone calls for ages, which has reduced her stress levels and she has been a different person even though she has a tough budget to follow.

I absolutely agree with this Lynda, I've got my debts being sorted out by them and it really is no-hassle thing.

Chin up chuck, and if push comes to shove, I've got a spare room and you can help me with the chooks and the lottie xxxxx

[ailsasyl]

Lynda can't add much more than what everyone else has said just wanted you to know I'm here for you, keep your chin up it will get sorted you just need to face it head on, so open the post, sort through it so that your ready to come out fighting. big hugs to you xx