Gardeners Rest #17 ( 2022)

[rary]

She offered to buy rary a drink, but ever the gentleman rary kindly declined, saying that he didn't have the time, as he had so much to do, and he carefully backed away. Leaving Janie wondering if his belt had broken, as he never moved his hands off his waist

[rary]

Looking round rary spied the croc, and wondered who would stuff a clock into a croc but couldn't make out whither it was a left foot or a right foot croc, possibly one of the pirates had a wooden leg and had been using one like a sporran to hold his wrist? watch

[Snoop Puss]

Everyone looked at Rary. He'd been thinking aloud, and while they had to admit the notion of a pirate using a wooden leg as a secret hiding place for his watch was intriguing, they weren't quite sure if maybe Rary meant the croc was being used as a sporran, which, seeing as the crocodile was alive, was definitely one-up on an alligator-skin handbag. All in all, they were somewhat mystified.

Nicos, ever the practical one, asked, "Rary, why are you holding your trousers up like that? Have you lost weight or put on weight? Or are you thinking of changing into the back end of the panto horse costume?"

NtG snorted.

[JanieB]

As Janie was unaware of any designated panto, she assumed Rary had decided he was Capt Hook in Peter Pan. So she swerved round him to the bar to see what booze was on offer. The only tap on show was for…..

[bramble]

Guinness.....Well she said, this is not looking good.
Is the Gardeners Rest under new management.
Just then there was a knock on the door and a voice called out....

[Nicos]

“Fresh bread delivery “ ……

[greenishfing]

...." Bread indeed", muttered Janie. "Where's the booze delivery???" Indeed Rary looked in desperate need of a glass or several before he lost his trousers........

[Nicos]

“Not sure “ said gf hunting through the pantry stores for more sherry and brandy for her baking…”but there are a couple of kilts in here wrapped around something”…..

[bramble]

So that's where Rary hides his whiskey..

[greenishfing]

Some in bottles but unbelievably some in bags ready for intravenous administration. ........

[Snoop Puss]

Bramble, thought, making a mental note of where to go hunting when hot toddies were called for.

Rary, venerable mind reader that he was, shouted 'and it's not my whisky bottles, in case you're wondering!' (though everyone thought he was protesting suspiciously loudly and hurriedly) as GF emerged from the pantry, her hand wrapped around...

[greenishfing]

.....a rather sad looking set of bagpipes.

[Snoop Puss]

'And they're not my bagpipes either', Rary exclaimed.

Nick snorted again.

Everyone looked at him. Hmm, they all thought in unison. He'd make a good front half of a panto bull or cow.

Rary, pulling his mindreading trick again, remarked 'Don't think I'm getting into the back half this year. And certainly not with those bagpipes for udders.'

Janie turned back to hunting bottles. 'Ah hah! Got one', she remarked, 'Let the party begin.' And where there was one bottle, there proved to be many.

While everyone was distracted, trying to find their favourite in among the stash of bottles, the bagpipes...

[Nicos]

…started wheezing…a deep resonant wheeze…..

[rary]

rary was in a quandary, does he let go of his wallets and hope the weight doesn't pull his breeks doon, or forego a free drink, ohh decisions, decisions