Gardeners Rest #18 (2023)

[Snoop Puss]

Rary. But he's already got a double and at least one other drink at the bar waiting for him. So it can't be him, thought Nicos.

Snoop thought she'd better get cleaning too. Didn't seem fair that Nicos and gf were doing all the work, while Rary had bunked off. Mind you, at least the sisters had followed after him after just one sip of the Fernet Branca. But she was still intrigued by what was underneath the floorboard.

'Guys', she said out loud. 'Cleaning up is a good idea, but you all need to see this first...'

[Florence Fennel]

If it looks like a Yule log it's nothing to do with me!

[Snoop Puss]

'Rary's panto horse costume is down there but there's all this other stuff too. Must have got shoved down there after we closed up last year. So no worries, Flo, not your Yule log. Mind you, you could make another for us if you fancy. But have a look and let's see what we all reckon', Snoop replied.

[Nicos]

If it looks like a Yule log it's nothing to do with me!

Yule log….. floor….
Are you sure Flo?


Nicos lowered her festive lantern into the hole whilst
Snoop stuck her head down ( VERY brave don’t ya think?)… and well, had a good snoop around. Something caught her eye ( not literally thank goodness)…
“Ooooooo… wow…. Who would have guessed? “….

[rary]

Meanwhile Flow was thinking to herself, of course this yule log has nothing to do with me, it's under the floor, not on the floor😏 so with that thought she turned her attention back to Snoop, Who would have guessed what???? and her eyebrows shot up, she couldn't believe what she was seeing. Why it's......

[Snoop Puss]

...the fairy.

Maybe last year's giant was down there too. Certainly the tree was there, some how miraculously as good as new despite being all scrunched up down what looked at first sight to be a small hole. (Snoop tried to avoid thinking of the Tardis being bigger on the inside than on the outside, as the hole somehow seemed to match that description, and even though she didn't quite succeed in avoiding thinking about it, she was definitely going to avoid mentioning it to Rary, who loved that Tardis like it was his own.)

Rary's panto horse costume got dragged out of the hole and was definitely not in such good condition as the tree. 'Sabotage?', GF wondered...

Nicos dropped all the cleaning fluids and grabbed the hugiferous box of decorations that somehow seemed to levitate of its own accord out of the hole. 'Would you believe it?', she exclaimed...

[greenishfing]

. .....as the fairy cleared her throat loudly to get their attention.

"Oh, Wow", murmered Snoop "Congratulations"

The fairy was struggling to get her hugely pregnant body upright. Nobody had seen a pregnant fairy before......

[Nicos]

“Who left all those darned mince pies down there?” She asked….(so was she pregnant ?….)…..

[Snoop Puss]

The giant popped his head out, blushing.

'Well, the mincemeat was down there and I found all this flour and butter and so on', he said. 'I've got quite good at making mince pies now. Anybody want one? There's a huge tray just out of the oven.'

Mince pies, decorations, old friends, the cleaning pretty well done. 'Well', thought Flo, 'Looks like this Christmas season is well and truly up and running.'

Just as Nicos was about to suggest a mince pie or two before setting about decorating the tree...

[Nicos]

…Rary came in holding a bundle of logs…”Can’t have Xmas festivities without a roaring fire!…let’s get it lit!”

Bren, the GR expert in starting up log fires, set about twisting up bits of old newspaper and stacking the starter wood whilst…..

[Snoop Puss]

Snoop settled down to finish off the cleaning but not before pointing Rary towards the drinks that were sitting on the bar for him and the fairy to a comfy armchair. Judging by the giant's solicitous treatment of the fairy, she was pregnant and not just full of mince pies, so there was absolutely no way she was going to be perching on top of the tree this year.

Talking of the tree...

[rary]

I must ask where those logs came from they smell of fresh pine thought GF, though won't ask in front of Snoop and Nicos as I'm sure they are secret police

[greenishfing]

"I'm getting paranoid......secret police...really?" thought GF.

"Giant what did you put in those mince pies???"

[Snoop Puss]

'Whatever it was, it wasn't me', said the giant. 'But I did see Rary pouring extra booze in the ones he's just eaten.'

'Rats!', thought Rary. 'There was me putting ideas in GF's head, but it looks like it's not Snoop and Nicos who are the secret police but the giant who's the secret detective. I'd better behave myself from now on.'

'Come on', said GF, shaking off the weird experience, 'let's have a look in the tree decorations box, see what we can find...'

[Florence Fennel]

Has no-one except me noticed that the comfy armchair occupied by a supposedly pregnant fairy now has a comfortable cushion? The fairy has a decidedly wicked grin on her face and an empty tutu. There is now a pregnant pause while the box of decorations is emptied of glitter balls, tinsel and what's this?