Gardeners Rest #19 (2024)

[Nicos]

A ‘fast cookie’ indeed is our Snoop…with a twist of her hip and a flick of her wrist, the Xmas tree was adorned with sparkling mince pies

”Well” said Nicos (absolutely astounded by Snoops skilful aim) “that beats me hands down for accuracy!”

[lottie dolly]

miz Spelling wants know just how the hek the pies got from the plate in the bar, to the tree,as that is not very hygene,if you not hold yourself in check,the cost of clean up ext WILL be added to your bill,as i not got enough to do today,talk about while the cats away,talk of which,i have not seen the ginger tom about,you lot have scared him away,i hope he gone back to FF,a lt safer there,she goes away to lay down in a darkened room.

[rary]

Good evening said rary, walking in to the bar, just popped in to let you know that I will not be in to the bar very often this year, due to the fact I am far outnumbered by women of the opposite sex 🤔 did that sound right?🙄 anyway as no doubt you all know I am extremely shy and easily intimidated, so due to that I will limit my attendance, plus I have went teatotal so dont want tempted by anything or anybody, but before I go out again I need to ask a question of Snoop, I know you have been having problems with heavy rain fall, but why do you need three bridges I know you have a large area to cover but three bridges must be a pain to maintain, I will get your answer the next time I come in, so with that I will wish you all a goodnight

[Snoop Puss]

Snoop was so focused on the issue of the bridges that she very nearly missed rary's remark about going teetotal. Very healthy and extremely commendable, but not at all what she expected. Just as well the GR served teas, coffees and soft drinks.

"As for the bridges", she replied to rary, "they were very expensive to install, but so far maintenance free." And to Flo she remarked, "they provide no advantage when playing pool to my knowledge. But as I've never actually played pool, I won't know for sure till I've tried."

And whispering to Nicos, in the hope that Miz Spelling wouldn't hear, "I remember there used to be mice at the GR before the refurbishment. If they're still here, they'll help clean up any crumbs from the pies."

[Nicos]

But yes of course Snoop….plenty still around but don’t let on - Hibou has done her best, but the darn things keep arriving!…nice and warm and snug in here for them I guess?

[greenishfing]

Aaaarrrggghhh!!!! I am renowned for having ears like a bat ..... (and exceptional close-up vision). I am also phobic about "those creatures".

You may well come across me atop the Christmas tree along with the fairy if I so much as glimpse one.

[lottie dolly]

EXCUSE ME PLEASE young ladeeeeezzzz, piped up Miz Spelling,i head that,this establishment is vermin free,NOT free vermin,if you have seen one then it must have come in with one of you that has SIGNED in,as bridges,that would be referance to one of our card games,just for your information,see i aim to help where i can,also,re to mince pies flying around,may suggest ,merely for your benefit,that you try our range of soft drinks,and leave the alcohol where it it,to those that drink guinness,if you not aware already,they are rationed,on account of a shortage,and will only be sold to those who have aready purchased several other drinks,i meant to notify you all of this earlier on,but,as you remember,i had to turn my hand to a chaimermaid for the day,thanks to one of you here,but i take it on the chin,as is i take my roll seriously,

[lottie dolly]

Where are my manners,welcome rary,would you like to be our Father Chrismas on chistmas eve,evening,we have a suit ready,it will be great for us to take turnes of cause,to sit on your knee and and,storke your white beard,no doubt it will change to a darker shade by the time they all wiped their sticky finger on it,your room and food ext would of cause be free,just for you,please bring your better half,as she can oversee none overstep the mark