advice on parenting.......

[veggielover]

Think its gonna have to be a lock and key job....... i need my mid morning sugar fix!

Thanks for all replies

[FionaH]

Think its gonna have to be a lock and key job....... i need my mid morning sugar fix!

Thanks for all replies

I still hide my Green and Blacks choccy its under the seed tin shhhhhhhhh

[maytreefrannie]

Just checking in to say I hope it all sorts itself out. I think hiding your own treats / treats for the rest of the family seems like a good idea. Also, I feel it's best not to give too much attention when it happens - easy for someone else to comment, not easy for you to know what's best.

You sound like a great parent to me, best wishes to you and your family.

[ckfe]

my daughter also has adhd, she's 6 and i totally agree with fiona.. my daughter doesn't compute things either, she doesn't seem able to process thoughts of consequences so it's almost impossible to find a punishment that will work
nothing phases her at all, we've grounded her, taken toys out of her room, cancelled horse riding lessons etc and all you get is a blank look and a so what attitude.
it's like banging your head against a brick wall, it's just so frustrating.. she's going through a lying stage at the moment.. she's been through the stealing stage and fortunately it does pass.. don't give up hope

[adamS]

As I'm only a seedling myself (see what I did there) - I can't give advice on parenting by any means, although I used to be a bit of a naughty one, pinching chocolate bars etc, but the fact that mum and dad used to just whack them in a basket in the cupboard helped!

It's been suggested before about responsibility, but if he's blaming his sister, when you buy a pack of 20 penguins or whatever, give him the responsibility of them, make him draw up a little list of what there is, and what day each one goes out... and then maybe reward him for keeping a good 'stock check' - that way he's incentiviced to ensure their wellbeing, won't blame his sister, and will give him a sense of ownership of the snacks. Part of pinching a snack is the knowing it's wrong, but if you're in charge of them, it's less fun!

Just my two penneth!

[Two_Sheds]

In my experience with ADHD,it doesn't take them long to suss if you make allowances & they will start playing on it!

Oh, she's right you know.
I have an autistic boy in my class, and I am always a bit wary of him (because he doesn't like me) but y'day he was on my table. Playing up, angry, not doing his work.
Then he threw a rubber at me. My 1st thought was "make allowances for him, let him off" but then I thought "No, I'm not having that" and I said "pick it up please".
I had to count to 2 and a half first, but he picked it up.

[zebedee]

Is it ADHD? Has it been diagnosed, or statemented? I'm not asking out of not believing you, it's just that too many 'authorities' throw these lables about like confetti. My youngest son was branded with this at school, and it turned out he has Autistic Spectrum Disorder (Asbergers) which is a totally different kettle of fish. I know it's a bind, and I totally sympathise with you, but with our son distracting him worked when he was getting ready for something. Lastly, it is IS ADHD, ask about Rytalin as a last resort. It does work in a large number of cases.

PS: part of my job is working with people like this. Feel free to pm me if you want.

[veggielover]

wow huge response to this, many thanks for all tips and all advice is gratefully received, ckfe, fiona..... that is exactly what my son is like, even now he's bouncing of the walls!! still not ready for school!!! I have an appointment with his specialist on the 16th i'm now thinking his medication is going to be increased, he is on quite a low dose at the mo, due to me not really wanting him to have meds but can see the improvements made whilst he is on it. As does the school! He is also taking melatonin 3 nights a week for help with sleeping, we finished the tabs 3 weeks ago and i thought i'd give him a rest from these to see if his natural sleep pattern had restored itself but it hasn't. Its not easy being a parent to an adhd child................

[veggielover]

Zeb.... its defo ADHD, he was diagnosed 2 years ago, after tests for autism and petit mals was ruled out. He is on medshas been for 18 months now. It makes a huge difference in his learning at school but not much in his behaviour at home but by the time he comes home its wearing off!

[ckfe]

my daughter is on ritalin too and you can definitely tell when they're wearing off.. she'll start talking at 100 miles an hour and can't shut up, yak yak yak yak yak, it's like chinese water torture.. and she'll be racing up and down like an exorcet missile, whoosh whoosh whoosh in front of your face... but while the tablets are working she's like a different child, i've been off work with her for the past 3 days because of half term and she's been a delight to be with, whereas before she was diagnose i used to dread having time off work
but i totally agree with two_sheds, you can't let them off or make allowances, i know that sometimes she can't help her actions but consistency is the key, we have to punish her regardless of if it's whether she's misbehaving because she's a normal child or if it's the adhd making her that way because sometimes there's just no way of knowing
like i said before though, no punishment works with her but at least it makes me feel a bit better for trying

[Two_Sheds]

that is exactly what my son is like, even now he's bouncing of the walls!!

I don't know if you've looked at his diet? Many children improve greatly if they are stopped from having squash drinks, sweets & fizzy.

[NOG]

The schools give these titles then when you ask for a statement they back off.

[Two_Sheds]

The schools give these titles then when you ask for a statement they back off.

Schools don't give statements - the local authority does

[di]

I don't know if you've looked at his diet? Many children improve greatly if they are stopped from having squash drinks, sweets & fizzy.

As well as the above,also some stuff that you'd normally consider healthy can be triggers.One of my nephews reacts badly to pure Orange juice!Although my sis has never tried eliminating it totally,if he "ODs" on wheat it has a similar effect.

[nikiwitch]

his level of meds may need changing, as his body grows they sometimes need to adjust the dosage, as to his behaviour, it may be worth hving a word with his doctor or a support group, my neice has adhd and sis in law has found them a great help