Good Friends

[Alison]

Alison thats really sad to hear......its great to meet like minded people and have a proper chat over a coffee....friendships are not all about 'personal lives' are they? Like you say each to their own.

Please don't think it's sad, I don't am more than happy with my life, a situation I always hope that as many people as possible can reach, by living their lives as they want.

Why even bother posting that? We all know how you feel about the forum by now Alison, so why put it in a thread which is about and by people who DO want to meet up and make new friends? :

I was simply trying to make the point that a forum is made up of all sorts of different types of people, thought it was a valid point but apparently not.

[zazen999]

I have a bit of a social anxiety thing going on, but I managed to get over it enough to meet Yo&Bob, Dobby & MrsD, and Digger07 (Dave) at Yo&Bob's which was a great day. Also Lynda & Auntie Mo came to visit after I came out of hospital, and Yo came to visit before Esther was born.
All of them are really lovely people and I would definitely call them friends.

I have biscuit anxiety - keep posting those recipes and I'm gonna be paying you a call...

The lovely thing I have found with Grapes in the flesh is how we have seemed to be on the same wavelength - in so many ways.

[SarzWix]

Alison, I'm sorry, I guess that came across as more snippy than I intended it to, tongue in cheek just doesn't translate well in type.

I have biscuit anxiety - keep posting those recipes and I'm gonna be paying you a call...

Me too, the bloomin tin is empty already! The kids will keep handing them out to their friends

[jackie j]

Make some biccies and post them this way they sound yummy and I cant cook. lol

[Alison]

Alison, I'm sorry, I guess that came across as more snippy than I intended it to, tongue in cheek just doesn't translate well in

No worries, often find the same problem myself - maybe we could get a this-is-meant-to-be-tongue-in-cheek-smillie to save confusion!

[HeyWayne]

No worries, often find the same problem myself - maybe we could get a this-is-meant-to-be-tongue-in-cheek-smillie to save confusion!

Or you could meet up so the confusion is less likely.

[shirlthegirl43]

I have had the pleasure of meeting Wellie and Trousers; Piskieinboots (I guess she hasn't managed to sort our her internet troubles yet) and Snowdrop; JanieB and Hazel at the Hill. also holidayed with the Dobby's last summer (now that is stretching a season description) and thoroughly enjoyed dinner with AllotmentLady and her family and Pipscariad and Pip (or Mr Pipscariad if you rather). As previously said, it is wonderful to meet grapes as there is the gardening, growing and vine bond to build on. I am not a social person and as some have mentioned, have no close friends. I grew up a loner with different interests to other kids and never mixed well. I get on better with people I have met through the vine because of the quirks that lead us to grow our own.

I hope to meet all the people I have already met again and to add many more grapes to my 'have met' list

[di]

i've met loads of people from other website and made some bloody good friends - got loads of dog walking buddies and friends to visit or who visit me - made a couple of good friends from here too, but only a couple

this site does seem a bit odd that the meets don't happen so much on here - maybe it's a midlands only thing? something in the water up there??!!

Right Mister!!!You still going camping later in the year?If so we'll bring the kiddies down for the day,then you can add two more to your list...you might not like us,but at least you'll have met us!

[snohare]

Strikes me it is fickle fate that determines how deeply people get into a forum. Some of it is just the feel of the forum. I have seen successful forums reformatted only to become ghost towns and seen cosy corners become more like the Champs Elysee. On the other hand....If your life takes you in a different direction, if you're not that into it, or if you simply have no time, have computer problems or if you simply don't live in the right area to make the meets - then you stay on the fringes, lurking. (If I was physically fit to do more, I'd spend less time here.) Once any of those factors change, then who knows ? It's a numbers game, like so much in life.
I will say here though, I miss the smilies I use a lot on other forums...particularly the finger waver, the nodding head, the kneeling and prostrating emoticon... They really can make all the difference in communicating nuances. (Imagine a nodding head emoticon here)

[Hilary B]

Once I have got to know people 'online' (and like them, as I do most people on here) I like to get to know them 'for real' and meeting so many at Wisley was great! That doesn't equate to getting any further into each others lives than anyone wants. We can get pretty close online as well, and that is WHY we start thinking that we would like to make it 'the real thing'.

The thing about 'specialist' fora like this one is that we have a certain amount of interest in common before we start.
It is amazing how many of us also seem to have similar sense of humour, and/or literary tastes.
It's a great way to get to 'meet' people, especially for those who live in hard-to-reach locations, or have limited scope for going anywhere.

[Hilary B]

Don't really have any urge to meet anybody from here, prefer to use it more mainly for it's original intent as simply a forum for learning more about gardening. I know the old saying that you can never have enough friends but don't have enough hours in the day to see my existing friends as it is so don't want to add to that. No offence, but I'm not really interested in your personal lives and don't want to discuss mine with you but each to their own etc etc.

I'm sure this wasn't meant to sound snobby or anti-social, but... it does, a bit. The thing about a forum is that it is made up of PEOPLE, and it isn't exactly polite to tell people that your only interest in them is to learn more about something, or that you don't want to add them to those you consider friends. As I said, I don't imagine it was meant to come over that way, it is so easy for things to sound sharper than intended on a forum (especially one that won't let you put in more than 4 emoticons, from a very limtied range).

[FionaH]

We definitely need more icons! So easy for sommat to come over wrong. I have lots of friends but always terrific to make more, especially with like minded souls.
I have met Selfraising, she lives down the road a ways from me. That has been fun and we have coffee natter about the garden, swap horror stories about our kids the works. Just like real friends (Just in case anyone missed the nuance we ARE real friends now!) I would love to meet up with Sarz but she is in the frozen north so not likely at the moment.

Just to refer to Alisons post I dont put much of my personal life on here, most of it isnt very interesting tbh. But was there any need to sound quite so disparaging? I am of the opinion if you dont want to read about peoples lives dont read the chat section, its easy enough to avoid.

[HeyWayne]

Woah woah woah people - lets not turn this into an Alison bash, she was only offering her opinion, which she is entitled to - even if it may differ from our own.

As it has painfully been illustrated on a number of occasions 'ere on t'vine, it's easy to misread someone's intention.

Now, back to this good friend business...

I think it's interesting to read that it is seemingly mostly women who are forming these close friendships. Is that a reflection of "real" life too?

I'm sure us dudes are just far too much of a temptation what with our charm, wit and general debonair demeanour.

[FionaH]

I think it's interesting to read that it is seemingly mostly women who are forming these close friendships. Is that a reflection of "real" life too?

I'm sure us dudes are just far too much of a temptation what with our charm, wit and general debonair demeanour.

As you are obviously all of the above Wayne it would probably be faaaaar too risky to meet up with you Being a lady of a certain age it might all be a bit too much for me

I dont think men do friends quite the way women do. Gassing is in our genetic make up I think. Lol I will probably get shot down in flames for that one

[snohare]

I too can gossip until the cows come home, especially about gardening. You'd never guess it from my posts, would you ? Of course I am a modern man, in touch with my feminine side...have to carry a big stick to beat off the ladies...