Is it just me or is this wrong?

[Hilary B]

The bottom line is that in some cultures the idea that children, and in particular young women, are not 'property' in the same sense as a working horse has not yet really sunk in to the local psyche.
I do find this totally intolerable. This 'forced marriage of a small child' is merely a symptom of the greater ill.

[HayleyB]

Very very wise words Hilary B and I agree with Heywayne too, wrong, so very very wrong

[SlugLobber]

How very sad, Bob. I don't wonder that you were sickened by it. A friend of mine was abused from the time she was 8yrs old and has never, ever gotten over it (she's almost 40). I cannot see the difference. No-one can convince me that this child bride will be allowed to wait until she's reached sexual maturity. The reality is that the husband will be able to dictate as and when HE *thinks* she's 'ready'. I do remember being 8 (although it's getting hazy...). I was making glove puppets and playing on roller skates. Boys were just other kid I played out with.

[bluemoon]

I don't think you can make a distinction between 'forced' and 'arranged' when the child is 8 years old. How can any child of that age do anything other than agree? A child is wholly dependent upon its parents, if they say there will be a marriage then that is what will happen. I agree that in many instances they are viewed as wage earners at that age, TEB, and to me that is also totally unacceptable. And I'm still worried about what would be a family's 'bottom line' when it came to marrying off their daughters, if 8 is acceptable then why not 6 or 4 or even 2? To me it is a gross betrayal of a person who is completely and utterly in your power and who should be able to trust you of all people with her welfare.

[smallblueplanet]

...So far as I can see, no-one has the slightest idea what the girl involved thought about things. Very many young, forced brides have nevre known anything else and it is as normal as "living in sin" is in the UK today.

If you are serious about that statement perhaps you'd like to consider what UNICEF says:

UNICEF has publicly labelled child marriage as a human rights violation and is working to combat the practice by developing education programmes and empowering local human rights organisations in regions where the practice is widespread.

Recently, UNICEF has publicly demanded an end to child marriages. A study on the practice declared that it often inflicts physical and emotional anguish on young girls and deprives them of the right to give free and full consent to marriage and the right to education.

Early marriage is also linked to health risks, notably due to premature pregnancy. Pregnancy-related deaths are the leading cause of death worldwide for girls aged 15 to 19.

UNICEF has also asserted that domestic violence is common in child marriages.

Some things are always WRONG, culture is no excuse.

[NOG]

She needs to be frightened....if the new hubby get bored of her the mother in law...will "accidently" spill parafin on her whilst she is cooking.

Loo on the BBC there is now a campain against forced marrage cos its the time of year that parents in Britian send their daughters to Pakistan to be married.

[lizzylemon]

This is a terrible and truly awful subject, no child should ever be put in that kind of situation. However and most unfortunately children are not seen as 'children' but more often than not commodities for the family - you only have see pictures of children scavaging city rubbish heaps and working in sweatshops to know this.

Abject poverty often forces these situations and for the family it could mean the difference between them all being homeless / starving or 'just one' daughter married off (I know there's no such thing as 'just one') and I've read of babies being married off (to each other not to adults) because of such debt. Usually the age between the child bride and groom is roughly 'reasonable' but again this is not always the case as it could raise more money to have a younger bride for an older groom (yes I know). It has also been known for some mothers to arrange the selling of their daughter virginity as that is the families only commodity too.

Woman are still very much 'Persona Non Grata' in many countries and there are many foul and abhorrent practices (female castration is huge in many African countries) which are being carried out hourly, daily, weekly against females across the globe but most of it goes unnoticed or ignored (yes by our government too) so raising awareness, signing partitions and chucking money into charity boxes are all tiny little things we can do to try help make changes somewhere along the line.

It won't happen over night and we will have to make compromises for the different cultures, because equally as it is wrong to for these sorts of thing to happen it is also wrong to roughshod over their entire culture and practices just because we don't see or understand everything they do, but hopefully with enough time and caring people like you guys, it will change in the right direction.

[TEB]

This is a terrible and truly awful subject, no child should ever be put in that kind of situation. However and most unfortunately children are not seen as 'children' but more often than not commodities for the family - you only have see pictures of children scavaging city rubbish heaps and working in sweatshops to know this.

Abject poverty often forces these situations and for the family it could mean the difference between them all being homeless / starving or 'just one' daughter married off (I know there's no such thing as 'just one') and I've read of babies being married off (to each other not to adults) because of such debt. Usually the age between the child bride and groom is roughly 'reasonable' but again this is not always the case as it could raise more money to have a younger bride for an older groom (yes I know). It has also been known for some mothers to arrange the selling of their daughter virginity as that is the families only commodity too.

Woman are still very much 'Persona Non Grata' in many countries and there are many foul and abhorrent practices (female castration is huge in many African countries) which are being carried out hourly, daily, weekly against females across the globe but most of it goes unnoticed or ignored (yes by our government too) so raising awareness, signing partitions and chucking money into charity boxes are all tiny little things we can do to try help make changes somewhere along the line.

It won't happen over night and we will have to make compromises for the different cultures, because equally as it is wrong to for these sorts of thing to happen it is also wrong to roughshod over their entire culture and practices just because we don't see or understand everything they do, but hopefully with enough time and caring people like you guys, it will change in the right direction.

Very well put

[maytreefrannie]

This is a terrible and truly awful subject, no child should ever be put in that kind of situation. However and most unfortunately children are not seen as 'children' but more often than not commodities for the family - you only have see pictures of children scavaging city rubbish heaps and working in sweatshops to know this.

Abject poverty often forces these situations and for the family it could mean the difference between them all being homeless / starving or 'just one' daughter married off (I know there's no such thing as 'just one') and I've read of babies being married off (to each other not to adults) because of such debt. Usually the age between the child bride and groom is roughly 'reasonable' but again this is not always the case as it could raise more money to have a younger bride for an older groom (yes I know). It has also been known for some mothers to arrange the selling of their daughter virginity as that is the families only commodity too.

Woman are still very much 'Persona Non Grata' in many countries and there are many foul and abhorrent practices (female castration is huge in many African countries) which are being carried out hourly, daily, weekly against females across the globe but most of it goes unnoticed or ignored (yes by our government too) so raising awareness, signing partitions and chucking money into charity boxes are all tiny little things we can do to try help make changes somewhere along the line.

It won't happen over night and we will have to make compromises for the different cultures, because equally as it is wrong to for these sorts of thing to happen it is also wrong to roughshod over their entire culture and practices just because we don't see or understand everything they do, but hopefully with enough time and caring people like you guys, it will change in the right direction.

My PC has been on the blink for a few days, so I've just read this thread.

I second TEB's comment - you have made excellent points and made them very well.

I agree we must respect all cultures, while also recognising the dignity and rights of each person. The right to a safe life with reasonable control over your life and decisions is surely a basic human right and one that should apply all over the world.

My heart goes out to the girl involved in Bob le P's story - surely she wouldn't be allowed to buy a house or enter into any other contract at such a young age, yet it's considered all right for her to be married - which is a contract.

Again, I agree with you Lizzy, about anything we can do to effect change for good.