Huh; no-one loves a smart-arse!

[geoff]

I was talking to someone at work about my allotment. I said that I had taken most of the crops off it, all I was doing at the moment was weeding and laying down newspaper.

"Oh", he replied. "I didn't know worms could read".

[FionaH]

LMAO there's always one!

[Glutton4...]

Are they intelligent worms in your area? Which paper have you 'provided?'

[SueA]

They might want to read the weather report to check whether to come up to the surface or not!

[Jeanied]

Or to read the weather worm-cast. (sorry, something came over me)

[piskieinboots]

tell him they are trained in the art of making paper pots for your seedlings - keeps 'em off the streets on a Saturday night

[HeyWayne]

A simple reply would suffice - "worms can read, and it would appear, cocks can talk"

[Jeanied]

A simple reply would suffice - "worms can read, and it would appear, cocks can talk"

* Gasp* OMG

[Snadger]

The thread title reminds me of a joke my youngest son told me years ago when he was a nipper!

Whats brown and does somersaults in the gutter?..........a clever shite!

He is 21 years old now!

[Stacey Steve]

Always lay the paper with political stories downward, that way the worms will know there is a lower life form than themselves

[Jeanied]

Always lay the paper with political stories downward, that way the worms will know there is a lower life form than themselves

Now THAT'S clever!

[organic]

If you did that the worms would probably move to the plot/garden next door in disgust!

[zebedee]

I was talking to someone at work about my allotment. I said that I had taken most of the crops off it, all I was doing at the moment was weeding and laying down newspaper.

"Oh", he replied. "I didn't know worms could read".

Ok, Geoff, next time you meet this person, follow these steps;
1) place your left hand over your right shoulder
2) swing it back again, very rapidly, ensuring firm contact with said persons temple
3) repeat steps 1 & 2 until a) you feel completely vindicated or b) they yell for mercy, or even c) they cease to move
4) if option c) is chosen from step 3) place said person in compost and quickly arrange an alibi.

ps: my alibi providing service is remarkably cheap.