Last of a dying breed

[Hilary B]

British manners???......interestingly so different throughout the world-remember that bank advert about different manners and offending behaviour?
Thankyou and respect should be universal.

- out of interest, elbows on tables etc are surely hangups from Victorian days when kids should be seen ( and as little as possible)and not heard.
I doubt the mother of a starving child in Africa would complain about her child eating with it's mouth open

Another excuse to put kids in their place????

Don't get me wrong- I think manners are important, but I've not got my head round which ones are imortantt and which ones are twee
Discuss......

Eating with mouth open is disgusting. I really don't want to see what you are chewing! Talking with mouth full, similarly. I agree that a lot of the rest is cultural, but some things ARE a matter of not making other people feel uncomfortable, and how can anyone be comfortable at being given the view of half-eaten food?

[HeyWayne]

and how can anyone be comfortable at being given the view of half-eaten food?

Equally, people can be made to feel uncomfortable if "etiquette" is made a big thing of.

If someone comes to my house for dinner I'll give them a knife, fork and spoon and be made to feel comfortable - whereas proper etiquette would suggest that I serve with the appropriate cutlery for the various courses. Salad fork, fish knife, soup spoon, dessert spoon and so on.

Isn't etiquette a way of determining social class historically? A way of elevating the "well to do's".

[OllieMartin]

Isn't etiquette a way of determining social class historically? A way of elevating the "well to do's".

Yes it is. I just like the tradition of it though.
If we have guests I ensure that the Butler, Cornforth, briefs them on the rules in the withdrawing room beforehand

Damn, shouldn't have said that, now I really want a butler called "Cornforth"

[HayleyB]

You have sweetie, in Gardeners Rest

[HeyWayne]

Damn, shouldn't have said that, now I really want a butler called "Cornforth"

You just wanna see what he saw.

[Nicos]

You just wanna see what he saw.

We're not onto underwear again are we????

[bluemoon]

My mother was obsessed with table manners and as a result so am I. I used to get weird looks when eating out with my kids because they could eat correctly with a knife and fork at 12 months old. I think I finally outraged my friend though when insisting upon correct table manners on a camping trip. It was five years ago and let's just say we haven't gone camping together since.

[HeyWayne]

How do people cope at barbecues?

[bubblewrap]

Never had one, haven't been to one for about 10 years I don't like burnt half cooked food.

[petal]

Seeing people eat with their mouths open actually makes me feel queasy - I worry about them biting their tongues. Now we are on to etiquette how about commuters? Basic rule- let people off before embarking yourself - people were forcing their way onto the train at Highbury Islington before anyone had a chance to get off - what a bunch of idiots? I always enjoy accidently stamping on someones foot when they do that! I did today - on a bolshy bimbos foot - HA!!!!!Pity I only had my trainers on........

[HayleyB]

Crikey Petal, wouldn't like to get into a scrum with you

[Alison]

I always enjoy accidently stamping on someones foot when they do that! I did today - on a bolshy bimbos foot - HA!!!!!Pity I only had my trainers on........

I've been known to do that too, used to get the metro to work and at one point I had an injured foot which meant I was using crutches to reduce the weight on my foot. Used to be fine when I got on as that was the start of the line but getting off before Manchester was another matter. It was hard enough when able bodied but I soon found that people shift very quickly following a sharp tap of a crutch on their shins

[OllieMartin]

Seeing people eat with their mouths open actually makes me feel queasy - I worry about them biting their tongues. Now we are on to etiquette how about commuters? Basic rule- let people off before embarking yourself - people were forcing their way onto the train at Highbury Islington before anyone had a chance to get off - what a bunch of idiots? I always enjoy accidently stamping on someones foot when they do that! I did today - on a bolshy bimbos foot - HA!!!!!Pity I only had my trainers on........

Same!, I just stop in the doorway and stare at them until they back off, or just provoke them by saying something like "No-one's getting on until I've got off".

[Jeanied]

So it was you, Ollie - I quaked in my shoes!! It is tough working out what constitutes good manners in a crowd of commuters determined to stampede!

A lot of this is deeply cultural - which means what is good manners in one culture may be a total no-no in another. Finger gestures of various kinds are a case in point!

[OllieMartin]

The Chap Manifesto

1. THOU SHALT ALWAYS WEAR TWEED. No other fabric says so defiantly: I am a man of panache, savoir-faire and devil-may-care, and I will not be served Continental lager beer under any circumstances.


2 THOU SHALT NEVER NOT SMOKE. Health and Safety "executives" and jobsworth medical practitioners keep trying to convince us that smoking is bad for the lungs/heart/skin/eyebrows, but we all know that smoking a bent apple billiard full of rich Cavendish tobacco raises one's general sense of well-being to levels unimaginable by the aforementioned spoilsports.

3 THOU SHALT ALWAYS BE COURTEOUS TO THE LADIES. A gentleman is never truly seated on an omnibus or railway carriage: he is merely keeping the seat warm for when a lady might need it. Those who take offence at being offered a seat are not really Ladies.

4 THOU SHALT NEVER, EVER, WEAR PANTALOONS DE NIMES. When you have progressed beyond fondling girls in the back seats of cinemas, you can stop wearing jeans. Wear fabrics appropriate to your age, and, who knows, you might even get a quick fumble in your box at the opera.

5 THOU SHALT ALWAYS DOFF ONE'S HAT. Alright, so you own a couple of trilbies. Good for you - but it's hardly going to change the world. Once you start actually lifting them off your head when greeting, departing or simply saluting passers-by, then the revolution will really begin.

6 THOU SHALT NEVER FASTEN THE LOWEST BUTTON ON THY WESKIT. Look, we don't make the rules, we simply try to keep them going. This one dates back to Edward VII, sufficient reason in itself to observe it.

7 THOU SHALT ALWAYS SPEAK PROPERLY. It's quite simple really. Instead of saying "Yo, wassup?", say "How do you do?"

8 THOU SHALT NEVER WEAR PLIMSOLLS WHEN NOT DOING SPORT. Nor even when doing sport. Which you shouldn't be doing anyway. Except cricket.

9 THOU SHALT ALWAYS WORSHIP AT THE TROUSER PRESS. At the end of each day, your trousers should be placed in one of Mr. Corby's magical contraptions, and by the next morning your creases will be so sharp that they will start a riot on the high street.

10 THOU SHALT ALWAYS CULTIVATE INTERESTING FACIAL HAIR. By interesting we mean moustaches, not beards