Happy New Year ?

[sewer rat]

Not had the brightest of starts to 2010. We saw in the bells okay, with Iona staying up with us. Then we left for Centerparcs, stopping ther night at my mum's - spent most of that evening breaking up a major row between my brother and my mum's partner. Got to Centerparcs on Monday, spent Tuesday swimming etc ( Iona's horseriding was cancelled due to fresh snowfall), then got a call from the Royal Victoria Hospital in Belfast - family all being called to Father in Law's bedside, last rites being administered, so packed up and spent most of Wednesday travelling to Stranraer then on the ferry - my darling wife has spent almost every minute since then at the hospital - it is only a matter of time - but I need to get back to work, Iona starts school again on Monday, Charlie will be stir crazy in the kennels and we are gonna have to make a deision tonight about staying on or going home - and the weather doesn't help much.
FIL fell and broke his hip but he is very old, has Alzheimers, is too weak for an operation, is still in a world of pain and the hospital seem at a loss as to what to do for the best - and to cap it all, he may have had a stroke yesterday - but they're not sure !
Things need to improve !

[Bigmallly]

Thought are with you SR, like you say things need to improve but unfortunately with these things, sadness also comes along.

[HeyWayne]

Dude - what a sh*tter of a year thus far. Things will improve soon I'm sure.

Thoughts are with you and yours chap.

[TPeers]

I am so sorry for you, sad and frustrating at the same time. Is there no friend of Iona's who she could stay with for a night or two so your wife can stay with her Dad and you can take Iona home and get to work?

Not idea I grant you, you want to be there for your wife but if needs must and all that.

[Dane End Dolly]

Geez what a rotten start to the year, thinking of you guys and hope things turn around for all of you soon.

[piskieinboots]

What a pile of doodoos SR we had the same (similar) situation this time last year, being called back to (up to Cheshire) hospice for last rites for FiL over a period of six weeks, it is so bl**dy draining.

Chin up lad, it will get better

[Flummery]

Blummin heck Rat - it must get better soon surely? Very difficult when the end comes for loved ones though. It just makes you feel helpless.

[zazen999]

Brown stuff all round by the sounds of it

Sending blessings your way chuck. xxx

[northepaul]

Hoping things improve for you soon mate!

[Hans Mum]

What a bummer of a start to the year, sending positive thoughts & hope things get better soon x

[Seahorse]

Really sorry it's been such a grim start to the year. I'm hoping Iona and Niamh are both too little to have taken much of it to heart? All my best to you and the Mrs for getting through the next few days/weeks. (hugs)

[Nicos]

Oh dear- what a rotten start to 2010.

It is decision time isn't it as what to do.
From a very practical point of view, I'd say that if your OH has feels she has said her goodbyes to her father then I'd go back home as a family. It may sound hard, but here's my reasoning...

I used to work with the elderly- and as Piskie says they can last for weeks after their last rights- I've known of several patients given them several times, having got much better in between. No-one knows when he will slip away.

As he has Alzheimers..how severe is it? Is he aware it is your OH with him...or when he last saw her? She may not actually be appreciated by him- only you will know that.If that is the case then she is company and saying her goodbyes.

As a family you need to support each other if the end does come very soon-
Would you all be going out for the funeral eventually - how important is it that Iona doesn't miss school?

Could your OH make a decision to go back to Ireland for the weekend say in 2-3 weeks if he's still hanging on?

Having moved away from the UK- I'm dreading our two elderly mothers passing away and having thought in depth as what we ought to do .... have finally decided the answer is to go with your instincts.

You feel you need to go back with Iona and get Charlie out of kennels and get back to your work, and yet support your OH. All that is very understandable. Question is- does your OH return with you? Only she can answer that.( It's difficult to give supporting hugs from a distance though)

I don't envy your decision- but it'll be the right one at the time
My thoughts are with you all xx

[selfraising]

I really feel for you SR. Mine hasn't been a great start either but nothing as bad as yours. Sunday due to go back to work on the Monday and did my back in. Then on Monday found a lump, straight down docs and waiting for appointment at hospital but no post getting through and am worrying myself silly.

[winstonwobble]

Hope things improve for you SR and your fil will be thinking of you and your family

[stella]

So sorry SR to hear of the bad time you are having. It is really hard when you feel you should do one thing and trying to decide about another and deciding what to do for the best, it is really hard. Hope it all comes alright for you all.