So sad ...............

[annacruachan]

What a tragedy, Tony; so sad for you all, especially your daughter. You're right, it is a slow suicide which usually stems from low self-esteem. It really worries me that so many young people nowadays seem to equate having fun with really heavy drinking. Have we somehow disenfranchised a whole generation?

Your timely reminder will make many of us stop and think about our drinking habits and their repercussions. Thank you for doing this at such a painful time for you. Best wishes to you all.

[Rhona]

How tragic - so sad for you all, especially your daughter, and the three poor girls losing their mother.

I'm so sorry that she wasn't able to change the path she was on. Heartbreaking for you all.

[SueA]

It is terribly sad Tony especially as everyone seems to have tried so hard & your D.i.L is loved by so many. Take care.

[SarzWix]

I absolutely loathe the 'drink culture' which seems to pervade life at the moment, including on The Vine. I constantly have to bite my 'virtual tongue' on here, and sometimes don't achieve it... Being married to an alcoholic is no fun at all, apart from the potential health issues, there's also the huge financial implications and lots of other minor issues which all put together can make life a never-ending misery for the partner who doesn't disappear into a fuzzy haze every day.

Anyway, I absolutely applaud your post post Tony, and pray for strength for you family to get through this.

[smallblueplanet]

A very sad tale. What makes someone do that with their life...

[Hilary B]

At the time it was horrible, but there are occasions when I am grateful for the bout of "bad cold with associated tummy upset" (I think it was well short of gastric flu, but a lesser version of similar symptoms) which I got on New Years Day about 30 years ago (yes, the day after a New Year party at the pub).
I have never been a heavy drinker (grew up in a Teetotal household, and didn't ever really rebel, just gradually came to enjoy wine with a meal and similar) but ever since those 3 days of the above ailment, before I get beyond 'tipsy', my stomach tells me I've had enough, so I stop!
The worrying thing is the way so many young folk (and several not-so-young, but it doesn't SPREAD among older folk) equate socialising and leisure activity with LOTS of alcohol. It's not just the odd drink, it's a competition to see who can get legless fastest, EVERY weekend (and in many cases every day).

[piskieinboots]

What makes someone do that with their life...

I guess (in many cases) they don't realise they are doing that - until it is too late

[Hilary B]

A very sad tale. What makes someone do that with their life...

It is so often a case of dealing with all sorts of disappointed feelings. I have wondered whether we have created a generation of discontentment, by encouraging high expectations (I don't feel that I put that very well. Young folk seem to be EXPECTED to demand a lot from life, and maybe that leads to them never having as much as they thought they would, and thus the disappointment that may trigger some of them to drink a lot.)

[piskieinboots]

I think you put that very well Hilary

[weekendwellies]

My thoughts are with you and all the family Tony. Such a difficult thing to beat. Well done for trying your best to help her fight it. Sometimes all we can do is just not enough. Time now for you to support your daughter and her stepdaughters. ((((( hugs ))))))

[bramble]

Tony, its very hard to stand by and see something bad happen when you know there's nothing you can do to help.
You and your family will be in my prayers.

[dexterdoglancashire]

So sorry to hear your news Tony. Our love and thoughts are with you and your family.
Bernie and Dexter

[bubblewrap]

Sorry to hear your news Tony.

I lost my first wife to alcohol abuse in 2002 aged 48. so I understand.
I knew Lynda had problems when I married her and thought I could help.
She was first ill in 1998 the year before we got married she was told to stop drinking or else it would kill her.
Well she did for about 4 months & during that time I also refrained from alcohol.
But Lynda knew better & though the "odd" drink would do no harm.
But the "odd" drink devoloped into a real problem.........she was drinking secretly.
To cut a log story short she was admitted to hospital in March & died June 1st 2002
Her death was painful & not a pretty sight.
One good thing though it made me cut down my alcohol consumption.

[binley100]

So sorry to hear your news Tony. What a tragic waste of life. I really hate this binge culture with drinking that youngsters have . I think what Hilary B says is true .we expect kids to behave like adults when they obviously are not mature enough .
Love and hugs to you and your family at this difficult and sad time. X

[Eco-Chic]

I think the easy availability and relative cheapness of alcohol are contributory factors to the binge drinking culture today.

I heard a woman relate that in her youth a packet of cigarettes cost her 1/- (5p) and a bottle of spirits circa 10/- (50p). Now a packet of ciggies costs more than £6 so the bottle of spirits would cost £72 if it had risen in line with the cigs.

I'm sorry for your family's loss Tony.