Lets write a story!

[Jeanied]

'Ha, this might be it' Gurty tapped the page with her finger, right at the point which read Deadly Nightshade.
The purple flowers seemed right, and poor Russell had the dark eyed, glazed look characteristic of poisoning with Belladonna.
'Quick - what's the antidote?' Gurty had a flash of inspiration - 'I'll use the excellent s****h facility on the Vine'. In a trice the search was complete and the answer to her question appeared on the screen.
Brandy and Green Tea.

[JanieB]

OMG we need a Calabar Bean. Where do we get one from and what do we do with it when we find one!!!

[binley100]

Use the S****h button silly. Haven't you learnt anything Said a little voice inside Gurty's head.

[MaureenHall]

But Gurty realised that she couldn't press the S****h button because she'd buried the lappy in the big hole in the garden

[sweetiepea]

AHHHHHH! Nothing else for it then but to bathe poor Russell in Gurty's best home brew. (This was one time she couldn't be criticised for enjoying juicy gossip!) As only a couple of minutes had passed since he’d had been zapped, Russell responded quickly to his alcohol bath and within seconds was howling bar songs and staggering across the floor. "You're back to your old self,” cried Gurty.

[lizzylemon]

With tounge lolling and eyes rolling, Russell staggered around the living, found a comfortable patch and promptly flaked out.

Rolling her eyes and smiling fondly at the passed out pooch Gurty walked back into the kitchen. Stopping dead in the middle of the room, she stared with total amazement at the plants - they had trebled in size and not one single hint of purple remained in the middle.

Meanwhile outside, the newly disturbed pile of soil had started to buck and boil and one by one the birds ceassed their singing. In the expectant silence that followed (and if the wind was blowing in the right direction) a strangely muffled shouting could be heard.

Unfortunately for Gurty walking into the kitchen had got the plants attention and as one they swung in her direction, snapping and snarling, they breathed fire in her direction.

B*gger! Snap Dragons!

[binley100]

" HELP. I NEED THE POMPIERS" Screamed Gurty.

[annacruachan]

"Soon sort you out," said Gurty, reaching into the pocket of her apron and bringing out a small can. She pointed the top at the Snap Dragons and pressed the nozzle. A spray of ginger powder covered the flowers instantly - mace!
A great deal of what sounded like sneezing ensued and the leaves of the strange plant waved about trying to clear the powder from the flowers. Both leaves and flowers began to shrink, forming a glutinous glob on the living room floor.
"Huh, always works," said the old woman triumphantly, and calling Russell she went out into the garden.

[binley100]

Only to find that indeed the pompiers had turned up .
"Bonjour Madame . Ou est le feu?" dit les pompiers
"oh dear, sorry lads " replied our intrepid Gurty " I managed to put it out . Would you like a cup of tea or perhaps something stronger?"