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  • New Alphabet

    Now The Alphabet:

    A's for arthritis; B's the bad back, C's the chest pains, perhaps car-di-ac?


    D is for dental decay and decline, E is for eyesight, can't read that top line!
    F is for fissures and fluid retention, G is for gas which I'd rather not mention.


    H high blood pressure--I'd rather it low; I for incisions with scars you can show.
    J is for joints, out of socket, won't mend, K is for knees that crack when they bend.
    L 's for libido, what happened to sex? M is for memory, I forget what comes next.
    N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low; O is for osteo, bones that don't grow!


    P for prescriptions, I have quite a few, just give me a pill and I'll be good as new!
    Qis for queasy, is it fatal or flu? R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.


    S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears, T is for Tinnitus; bells in my ears!
    U is for urinary; troubles with flow; V for vertigo, that's 'dizzy,' you know.


    W for worry, now what's going 'round? X is for X ray, and what might be found.
    Yfor another year I'm left here behind, Z is for zest I still have-- in my mind!


    I've survived all the symptoms, my body's deployed,
    and I'm keeping twenty-six doctors fully employed!

  • #2
    Brilliant...think I've got at least half the alphabet!

    Jules
    Jules

    Coffee. Garden. Coffee. Does a good morning need anything else?

    ♥ Nutter in a Million & Royal Nutter by Appointment to HRH VC ♥

    Althoughts - The New Blog (updated with bridges)

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    • #3
      Pretty good description of how I feel, even if I haven't really got all the ailments I have most of the symptoms!
      Granny on the Game in Sheffield

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      • #4
        Oh dear you just described my life
        WPC F Hobbit, Shire police

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        • #5
          I started reading that with a smile. It changed to a frown, half way down, and resigned acceptance by the time I reached the bottom. Ho hum!
          All the best - Glutton 4 Punishment
          Freelance shrub butcher and weed removal operative.

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          • #6
            Thought of you too when I read that nutter!
            Never test the depth of the water with both feet

            The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory....

            Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

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            • #7
              * slaps RT sharply about the ears....
              All the best - Glutton 4 Punishment
              Freelance shrub butcher and weed removal operative.

              Comment


              • #8
                Brilliant - you should submit this and write more!
                Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better...Albert Einstein

                Blog - @Twotheridge: For The Record - Sowing and Growing with a Virgin Veg Grower: Spring Has Now Sprung...Boing! http://vvgsowingandgrowing2012.blogs....html?spref=tw

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                • #9
                  Any chance of a large print version?
                  A simple dude trying to grow veg. http://haywayne.blogspot.com/

                  BLOG UPDATED! http://haywayne.blogspot.com/2012/01...ar-demand.html 30/01/2012

                  Practise makes us a little better, it doesn't make us perfect.


                  What would Vedder do?

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                  • #10
                    is it safe to come out of hiding yet? *peers around*
                    Never test the depth of the water with both feet

                    The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory....

                    Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by HeyWayne View Post
                      Any chance of a large print version?
                      Would you like to borrow my reading glasses?
                      Last edited by cardiffsteve; 30-08-2011, 06:17 PM.

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                      • #12
                        Are they vary-focals?
                        A simple dude trying to grow veg. http://haywayne.blogspot.com/

                        BLOG UPDATED! http://haywayne.blogspot.com/2012/01...ar-demand.html 30/01/2012

                        Practise makes us a little better, it doesn't make us perfect.


                        What would Vedder do?

                        Comment

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