I've bought a wood!

[Glutton4...]

No excuse needed, in my opinion. Cheers!

Said obstruction is refusing all attempts at extraction at the moment, and my assistant is becoming reluctant. I think I'll replenish my glass, and pour some of it down my lugg'ole!

[bearded bloke]

Party on people ..................

[veggiechicken]

Olive oil or any other oil (apart from Engine oil) should do it. Put some in, block your ear with cotton wool and sleep on it. Try again tomorrow when it will have softened up.
Meanwhile, have another glass or three to take your mind off it. Oh, and be very grateful that none of the wise women are around. they probably have trained spiders that could crawl in and haul the bud out

[veggiechicken]

Welcome back Much, you have be Much missed, especially as you know where the other casks are secreted.

[Potstubsdustbins]

Party on people ..................

Now thems what I call tights.

Tuck

[Glutton4...]

Said obstruction was removed! Cheers! *raises glass

Warm saline dribbled in.
Glug.
Squeek.
Tickle.
Glug.
Tipped head, water ran out, bung stayed put.

Second time, it worked!

I feel strangely lop-sided now. Cheers!

[veggiechicken]

It must have been quite earie, Ostler! Glad you're sorted as you need to be alert, with the hounds at the ready, in case the Sheriff should appear.... Meanwhile, lets raise another glass.. Hic!!

[Glutton4...]

*Clinks glass...

Cheers me Hearties! The animals are all a-snorin' an' I think it's about time I joined 'em!

I wish thee verily good night, and may the woodland faeries help you sleep soundly and safely till the morrow.

[veggiechicken]

Sleep well amongst your animals. For thou art assured of warmth and company, while I dream alone beside the dying embers.....

[Nicos]

Well, goodly woodland folk. I appear to have a problem with my ear. I bathed in the river, soaked my aching bones, washed my locks, an' all other parts too. Then, whilst drying out my ear'oles I inadvertently lost the end of a cotton bud!

T'is OK though, I can hear out t'other ear'ole.

*Sups a medicinal Grin an' tonic.

Don't appear to have a crochet 'ook 'andy...

Here- you may pick a surgical instrument from the First Aid box.... ( 'elf n safety n all that! )

[zazen999]

TIME!
Gentleman please.



AKA - get thee to bed as I'm Friar Tucked out.

I'll leave the pots for Much, I hear he has form.

[Feral007]

Honestly people! I can't read as fast as you can write. I only got up to page 11 so get Taff to chop my head off if I'm out of date. I cant believe you only started drinking on page 11 and here you are stonkered by page 36 - where is your stamina for goodness sakes!

I'll just whisper now since I'm sure you're all hungover. Congratulations VC! A wood! I have the Bush (I am not going to say I have a bush because those jesters will be hooting over that!) Old trees even! Sounds very cool.
Now I am a nurse and a homeopath - so I would be able to remove buds from ears - if some crafty wench had a crochet hook handy. But if both those positions are taken, then I am also a midwife - and from the sounds of all the wenching going on there'll be a need for at least one midwife! But all the babies will have to be born during the day because I want to be having fun in the evening!

I have a chainsaw. And I could bring the kelpies and they could run howling thru the dark woods.

And just imagine being able to walk in the wood summer and winter. And not take the snake bandages with you! Now that is what I call a good wood!

Edited to add: I have a good homeopathic remedy for hangovers.............

[Bigmallly]

I have a good homeopathic remedy for hangovers.............

Me too.......Don't have too many Little John Smiths.........

[veggiechicken]

The Cast List - All you need to know
Robin Hood - Pa Snips ............ Little John - HeyWayne,
Maid Marian - Me of course .......... Maid Marian's lady's maid - Lottie Dolly
BigMallly the Fletcher - the Gorilla. ......... Friar Tuck - Potstubsdustbins
Much the Miller's son - Bearded Bloke
Will Stutely - MrBadExample .......... Will Scarlet - Newton - camping in a red wig
King Richard the Lionheart - DGoulston............ The miserable Jester - Cardiff Steve
Sheriff of Nottingham - madasafish ....... The Executioner - Taff the Axe
Master Brewer at the Red Thorn Tavern - Red Thorn (House Ale - Red Stocking)
Mistress Quickly of the Tavern - Virgin Veg Grower
Bringer of the Brains Bitter Wench - Nicos............ Buxom Wench - OverWyreGrower.
Buxom Old Crone Serving Wench, scavenger and a bit of a witch - Donnakebab
Merry Maid and Wenches - Mandyballantyne & Moo's Mum
Chief Cook and Bottle washer - Binley ..............Buxom Kitchen Wench - Jeanied
Herbalist and Merry man (archers) - Peas'n'kews and Mr P'n'K
Lady Lottie the spinner and weaver - Lady Lottie
Falconer Wench - Mothhawk ............ Local Peasant - Bren in Pots
Gypsy Wench Bearing - Zazen
Hostler and 'untsperson - Glutton4......
Nurse and Midwife - Feral007

Still recruiting : Allan A'Dale - a Roving Minstrel, Arthur a Bland - a Poacher
David of Doncaster - a wrestler, lots of Merry men, Minstrels and wenches. Desperate for Minstrels! Wodger the Shrubber and an old Crone. Hermit, Optician (Yeah I know!!) and some baddies - the Sheriff's men! Tax collectors (boo, hiss).

[veggiechicken]

Good Day to you Mistress Feral. Methinks you are a welcome addition to our Merry Band for we had sore need of a Nurse yestereve. Our Miserable Jester has been laid low with a touch of the loose green stuff on the chest while the cack-handed Hostler managad to lose something in 'er lug'ole.
The Senior Serving Bitter wench did bring forth her set of surgical tools but we were in need of a deft hand to assist with the extraction of the offending object. methinks your skills as Midwife would have been most desirable. Welcome to the cast Nurse and midwife Feral - thou are well named for a life in the wood.