You know you're old when....

[bubblewrap]

When the policemen look younger than your children!

[bubblewrap]

you are old when it takes all night to do what you used to do all night

you are older still when you cant remember what you used to do

I'm not as good as I once was!
But I'm as good once as I ever was!
And once is plenty for Madderbat!!!!!

[jacob marley]

your getting old when

When the policemen look younger than your children!

aint that the truth

[rustylady]

The children ask you to go to the fair with them and the grandchildren, and you say no thanks because you can't stand the crowds and the noise and there isn't a single ride that you want to go on except the baby ones!! The others make you feel ill, or have health warnings on them that exclude you anyway.

[Grandpadragon]

You feel old when the Grandchildren start calling you Grandad :

No Snadger its when ALL children call you Grandad!

[bubblewrap]

When the prime minister & most of the cabinet are younger than you.

[zebedee]

I totally agree with Grouch Marx, who said, and I quote:
"You are only as old as the woman you feel!"

Don't blame me for that. He said it on his last telvised tv interview!

[Flummery]

Ah but he was rich! You'll probably get slapped more, Zeb!

Flum

[HeyWayne]

Found these:

1. You and your teeth don't sleep together.

2. Your try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks and discover you aren't wearing any.

3. At the breakfast table you hear snap, crackle, pop and you're not eating cereal.

4. Your back goes out but you stay home.

5. When you wake up looking like your driver's license picture.

6. It takes two tries to get up from the couch.

7. When your idea of a night out is sitting on the patio.

8. When happy hour is a nap.

9. When you're on vacation and your ENERGY runs out before your money does.

10. When you say something to your kids that your mother said to You, and you always hated it.

11. When all you want for your birthday is to not be reminded of your age.

12. When you step off a curb and look down one more time to make sure the street is still there.

13. Your idea of weight lifting is standing up.

14. It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.

15. Your memory is shorter and your complaining lasts longer.

16. Your address book has mostly names that start with Dr.

17. You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.

18. The pharmacist has become your new best friend.

19. Getting "lucky" means you found your car in the parking lot.

20. The twinkle in your eye is merely a reflection from the sun on your bifocals.

21. It takes twice as long - to look half as good.

22. Everything hurts, and what doesn't hurt - doesn't work.

23. You look for your glasses for half an hour and they were on your head the whole time.

24. You sink your teeth into a steak and they stay there.

25. You give up all your bad habits and still don't feel good.

26. You have more patience, but it is actually that you just don't care anymore.

27. You finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.

28. You wonder how you could be over the hill when you don't even remember being on top of it.

[bubblewrap]

6. It takes two tries to get up from the couch
Only two??

[SarzWix]

Went to Maximo Park gig @ Leeds Uni last night. Only managed to keep up with the pogo-ing student masses for the first 3 tunes, then had to retire to the back to recover. Today, i can barely move without creaking/groaning, my eyes feel like they've had sand poured in them, and i look like i haven't slept in a week...
Am I too old for these shenanigans now...?!




Ignorance Isn't Bliss

[yoanbob]

when you'd rather stay in and play board games than be bothered shouting at people who cant hear you over the music and who you dont really like anyway

[bubblewrap]

when you'd rather stay in and play board games than be bothered shouting at people who cant hear you over the music and who you dont really like anyway

Beer at home is cheeper too!

[madderbat]

Thanks Wayne - belly laughs this morning. Relate to most of them (but do have my own teeth)

when you'd rather stay in and play board games than be bothered shouting at people who cant hear you over the music and who you dont really like anyway

Soo true! I gave up going out 'on the town' in the evenings about 10 years ago. I went into town with some friends, nice meal, went for a drink and
1) couldn't get served at the bar;
2) couldn't hear a word friends were saying.
Sat a the table, nodding and smiling for a bit, couldn't get to the loo and gave up.

Haven't been to a pub in town at night since. Too many students/youth screaming and shouting at each other over the piped music - horrible.
We occasionally go to a nice quiet local pub which serves real ale, but usually home before dark!

Am definitely geting old.

[Mrs Dobby]

You know you're getting old when.........

........ you dont recognise any of the singers or groups that are in the charts, BUT you do recognise 'celebrity' gardeners and chefs!