Hope you're not hiding out because you've had a smoke!
I gave up when the boys were 6 months old. Haven't had one since. Really can't bear the smell of smoke now. The kids used to come back from their father's smelling of smoke hair/clothes. It was hard. But I survived, and hope to survive to see my grandkids. One of my boys started smoking for a few months. Couldn't work out why he woudn't stay overnight when he came to visit.......ah now I know!
They don't remember me smoking so he was worried I'd freak out. Not liking it, but by the time he told me, he said he was trying to give up. Told him it was hard, but that I was sure he could.
At work I counsel people who are interested in giving up. You can't give up because someone else wants you to. But it sounds like you want to give up because you want to set a good example for your children, you want to be healthy and have a great chance of enjoying a long healthy life with them.
So there are two things to give up.
1) The nicotine.
2) The habit. The habit is the hard part.
So there are ways to do it. Cold turkey as you are. Your cells are calling out for their fix and it's hard.
Another way (and if you find you didn't stay on the wagon) then you can try cutting down. So you cut out every 3rd smoke for a few days until you can cope with it. Then keep doing that till there are less and then every 2nd one. Dont do this too fast, or you'll end up having to start again. But it works for some people.
Another way is using Nicotine Replacement Therapy. You get your nicotine, and diminish it slowly (patches, gum, pills, or inhaler like some lung medicaitons) Careful of the pills, they work well but give some people shockingly horrible depression.
So what ever way you give up the nicotine, the ongoing hard part - which is what is torturing you now, is the habit.
Easier to swap a habit than give it up. Some people chew gum, some eat a lot of food. When I gave up I used sunflower seeds. Really love the beggars now But they have a benefit of not putting on too much weight, they are small and you can have lots of those little ziplock plastic bags around the home, the car, the work/office.
They give you something to fiddle with and they are hand to mouth, and then involve chewing. It really can work - unless you hate sunflower seeds, or someother similar.
So you have a distractor. And that's good.
But you have lots of triggers for smoking.
Work out what they are.
Do you always have a smoke say at 10am, with Dave, at the corner of the garden, with a coffee?
If you go to that corner of the garden with Dave and a coffee, you will want one RIGHT NOW.
But if you can meet Dave somewhere else, at 11am, inside, and have a cup of tea, or a soft drink?
You break up your triggers and it's easiser.
Alcohol always makes it harder. Try to have as many distractors as possible, and ask you family and friends to not give you a smoke, no matter how much you beg them (or threaten them)
Is stress a trigger? Do you use it as a way to get away from a difficult situation.
Lots of people will go out for a smoke when they are stressed at work. You can hold up your smoke and say 'I have to go out for a smoke.' People accept that smoker pop out for one.
Try holding up a carrot stick and saying 'I have a carrot and need to go out.' They'd be saying WTH?
But you can practise some relaxation techniques. Practise them at home. I've got a website that has fabulous relaxation tech's.
beyondblue: the national depression initiative This has a downloadable pdf that can be helpful.
You can also use those things like tapping, or wearing an elastic band on your wrist and snapping it when you feel like you have to have one. It's another way of making your brain concentrate on something else.
Remember tho, if you do have a relapse, it's not the end of the world. Just start giving up again straight away. Women are far more used to trying diets and having to start again from time to time. Men sometimes think if they don't manage it the first time that's it.
Think positive. But be realistic.
No one wants to give up smoking. It sucks.
A lot of people would like to be a reformed smoker tho.
So if you concentrate on where you will be - the end goal, you'll find that it is easier most of the time.
Concentrating on 'not having' the next smoke makes you think about nothing else.
And give yourself regular rewards. More frequently in the beginning.
Make it something you really enjoy, that you wouldn't nomally be doing.
Best of luck, and drop in often, support is really helpful.
I've also dreamt of smoking and woke horrified, and then relieved when it was only a dream.
I gave up when the boys were 6 months old. Haven't had one since. Really can't bear the smell of smoke now. The kids used to come back from their father's smelling of smoke hair/clothes. It was hard. But I survived, and hope to survive to see my grandkids. One of my boys started smoking for a few months. Couldn't work out why he woudn't stay overnight when he came to visit.......ah now I know!
They don't remember me smoking so he was worried I'd freak out. Not liking it, but by the time he told me, he said he was trying to give up. Told him it was hard, but that I was sure he could.
At work I counsel people who are interested in giving up. You can't give up because someone else wants you to. But it sounds like you want to give up because you want to set a good example for your children, you want to be healthy and have a great chance of enjoying a long healthy life with them.
So there are two things to give up.
1) The nicotine.
2) The habit. The habit is the hard part.
So there are ways to do it. Cold turkey as you are. Your cells are calling out for their fix and it's hard.
Another way (and if you find you didn't stay on the wagon) then you can try cutting down. So you cut out every 3rd smoke for a few days until you can cope with it. Then keep doing that till there are less and then every 2nd one. Dont do this too fast, or you'll end up having to start again. But it works for some people.
Another way is using Nicotine Replacement Therapy. You get your nicotine, and diminish it slowly (patches, gum, pills, or inhaler like some lung medicaitons) Careful of the pills, they work well but give some people shockingly horrible depression.
So what ever way you give up the nicotine, the ongoing hard part - which is what is torturing you now, is the habit.
Easier to swap a habit than give it up. Some people chew gum, some eat a lot of food. When I gave up I used sunflower seeds. Really love the beggars now But they have a benefit of not putting on too much weight, they are small and you can have lots of those little ziplock plastic bags around the home, the car, the work/office.
They give you something to fiddle with and they are hand to mouth, and then involve chewing. It really can work - unless you hate sunflower seeds, or someother similar.
So you have a distractor. And that's good.
But you have lots of triggers for smoking.
Work out what they are.
Do you always have a smoke say at 10am, with Dave, at the corner of the garden, with a coffee?
If you go to that corner of the garden with Dave and a coffee, you will want one RIGHT NOW.
But if you can meet Dave somewhere else, at 11am, inside, and have a cup of tea, or a soft drink?
You break up your triggers and it's easiser.
Alcohol always makes it harder. Try to have as many distractors as possible, and ask you family and friends to not give you a smoke, no matter how much you beg them (or threaten them)
Is stress a trigger? Do you use it as a way to get away from a difficult situation.
Lots of people will go out for a smoke when they are stressed at work. You can hold up your smoke and say 'I have to go out for a smoke.' People accept that smoker pop out for one.
Try holding up a carrot stick and saying 'I have a carrot and need to go out.' They'd be saying WTH?
But you can practise some relaxation techniques. Practise them at home. I've got a website that has fabulous relaxation tech's.
beyondblue: the national depression initiative This has a downloadable pdf that can be helpful.
You can also use those things like tapping, or wearing an elastic band on your wrist and snapping it when you feel like you have to have one. It's another way of making your brain concentrate on something else.
Remember tho, if you do have a relapse, it's not the end of the world. Just start giving up again straight away. Women are far more used to trying diets and having to start again from time to time. Men sometimes think if they don't manage it the first time that's it.
Think positive. But be realistic.
No one wants to give up smoking. It sucks.
A lot of people would like to be a reformed smoker tho.
So if you concentrate on where you will be - the end goal, you'll find that it is easier most of the time.
Concentrating on 'not having' the next smoke makes you think about nothing else.
And give yourself regular rewards. More frequently in the beginning.
Make it something you really enjoy, that you wouldn't nomally be doing.
Best of luck, and drop in often, support is really helpful.
I've also dreamt of smoking and woke horrified, and then relieved when it was only a dream.
Comment