Am I being unresonable?

[binley100]

So has he posted it as an 'open' event on FB ? Maybe some of us could invite ourselves along

[zazen999]

So has he posted it as an 'open' event on FB ? Maybe some of us could invite ourselves along

Yeah but it is limited to 50 places. So he has emailed the top 50 their tickets.

Note, I have no intention of going, never did...hence not paying attention until I found out he had been hassling Beth. Which I was annoyed about due to a bereavement...she didn't need that going on when I had already stated our intentions.

[binley100]

He sounds a complete @rse......

[Scarlet]

Yes, he is an ar$e!! Stuff like this gives me sleepless nights! Can you just say there is no produce available that month? Although donations will be graciously accepted...

[zazen999]

Yes, he is an ar$e!! Stuff like this gives me sleepless nights! Can you just say there is no produce available that month? Although donations will be graciously accepted...

No I've said no produce will be available as it's for volunteers, locals and those on low incomes and not for a back slapping jolly. And I've said it isn't in the spirit of community gardens. And that it is disgraceful.

[veggiechicken]

I have posted that it's the opposite of a harvest festival. Taking from people who deserve it and giving it to people who can afford it.

Hmmm, why does this sound familiar..........set in Nottingham, Robin Hood feeding the poor and the wicked Sheriff of Nottingham scheming away with his lackeys.
The Sheriff is totally out of order, capture him and put him in the stocks so that all can mock him and pelt him with rotten veggies. He is a bounder and a rogue!

[chris]

Quite surprised no one from the silly brigade has come in and turned this thread on it's head yet.

And nope, I don't think you're being unreasonable at all.

[SarzWix]

Having noseyed into this a bit further, I still don't think you're being unreasonable. If he wasn't selling it as being 'a community event' in order to get food donations, it wouldn't be so bad, in fact as a fundraiser it's a reasonable idea. The problem comes when you find it hasn't been advertised anywhere but his little FoE page on FB. No local advertising at all. And, as you say, all people who can afford tickets...

And, I can't see where the money raised is going? Is it on local projects, or into a central FoE pot?

[Mikey]

I really dislike it when charities try and badger you, and I like it even less when they try and guilt trip you.

I think you are right to stand your ground but I'm not sure I would have replied in the same manner. I would have made it clear that you would be unable to support the event as it did not adhere to your strict guidelines of provision, and left it at that.

You never know when and who's support you might need in the future and diplomacy can be a difficult pill to swallow.

[bearded bloke]

Quite surprised no one from the silly brigade has come in

Late on parade,sorry Chris




Someone get the smelling salts ready









Stick it to him Zaz

[Kirk]

Problem is you now seem to be in an arguement with him. Would have been easier to have sidestepped everything - maybe have said that unsure of the situation concerning the amount of produce available and would need to distribute produce first as required by your conditions of being a community garden. Then ignored him.

Suggest you don't go via a phone as there is no "copy" of what he says, emails may be used against him if he is being difficult. Copies of email can be sent to the next 2 steps up of FOTE and complain, do not go up just one step as the person there may be a friend. Phones are useful but then he says you got it wrong and he didn't say what you are saying he did.

FOTE are nothing or little to do with garden produce. Could point out that FOTE could be showing what can be purchased that fits in with good practices. Thus showing people at the event how to purchase responsibly from the high street, and as a local additional supporting the local high street shops. The idea being to show what can be sold and purchased from a responsible source not begged from one.

Really 2 options, ignore him and hope he goes away - if you have caller display get someone else to answer the phone unless you recognise the number as not being him. Easy for someone else to say no idea what the situation is and they cannot commit anything.

Hell, just lie and say that someone in your group who is NOT a friend of FOTE has said that if you give produce away to outside of the group they will complain, and you could lose the garden under the agreement you have.

Create an email address called GDNCommittee@something and get him to put a request in to that, and it will get discussed at the next meeting. That "meeting" can be held say the first week of December when you all sit down to discuss the success oif this year and decide what to plant for next year, or even next year (Feb 31 is a good date).

Could contact FOTE higher up and complain about being harrassed. You appear to have the condition that produce has to go to the immediate people and so is not for distribution outside of that. The alternative being the possible removal of the community garden. Your point being that a member of FOTE are pressurising you into putting the garden at risk.

One thing about Facebook is that it can also be used against the person, do you know someone that can link from/to his page to a page complaining about the harrassment. FOTE will not like a problem of their potential creating being aired on Facebook.

Best to not argue, sidestep it all and just ignore them I would say if possible. Next time be better prepared, there will be a next time, from one source or another.

[Tripmeup]

One word springs to mind..
......Obnoxious odious arrogant chancer

[Bill HH]

One word springs to mind..
......Obnoxious odious arrogant chancer

Erm thats 4 words.

[FROSTYFRECKLE]

No point saying what I think of the chancer as I'm sure sure you have called him every name under the sun (which he rightly deserves). No you are not being unreasonable.

[zazen999]

Problem is you now seem to be in an arguement with him. Would have been easier to have sidestepped everything - maybe have said that unsure of the situation concerning the amount of produce available and would need to distribute produce first as required by your conditions of being a community garden. Then ignored him.

Suggest you don't go via a phone as there is no "copy" of what he says, emails may be used against him if he is being difficult. Copies of email can be sent to the next 2 steps up of FOTE and complain, do not go up just one step as the person there may be a friend. Phones are useful but then he says you got it wrong and he didn't say what you are saying he did.

FOTE are nothing or little to do with garden produce. Could point out that FOTE could be showing what can be purchased that fits in with good practices. Thus showing people at the event how to purchase responsibly from the high street, and as a local additional supporting the local high street shops. The idea being to show what can be sold and purchased from a responsible source not begged from one.

Really 2 options, ignore him and hope he goes away - if you have caller display get someone else to answer the phone unless you recognise the number as not being him. Easy for someone else to say no idea what the situation is and they cannot commit anything.

Hell, just lie and say that someone in your group who is NOT a friend of FOTE has said that if you give produce away to outside of the group they will complain, and you could lose the garden under the agreement you have.

Create an email address called GDNCommittee@something and get him to put a request in to that, and it will get discussed at the next meeting. That "meeting" can be held say the first week of December when you all sit down to discuss the success oif this year and decide what to plant for next year, or even next year (Feb 31 is a good date).

Could contact FOTE higher up and complain about being harrassed. You appear to have the condition that produce has to go to the immediate people and so is not for distribution outside of that. The alternative being the possible removal of the community garden. Your point being that a member of FOTE are pressurising you into putting the garden at risk.

One thing about Facebook is that it can also be used against the person, do you know someone that can link from/to his page to a page complaining about the harrassment. FOTE will not like a problem of their potential creating being aired on Facebook.

Best to not argue, sidestep it all and just ignore them I would say if possible. Next time be better prepared, there will be a next time, from one source or another.

Being in an argument is not a problem. I could have done alot of things like ignore him...which i would have done had he just left it as I thought he had. I only delved into it when I found out about the hassling of my friend. I have no problems in how I deal with it - just wanted opinions on whether I was being unreasonable or not and it seems people agree with me.