Big Changes in Your Life ?

[KevinM67]

Sorry for the thread title coming across as being a bit 'melodramatic', but.....

After, spending the festive period over in Ireland - my better half wants to move there this year.

I know It's not Outer Mongolia (although Bramble might want to confirm this) - it does mean selling up and venturing in to the unknown to a bit.

Although looking 20 years younger, I'm approaching 50 years old next year - the thought of looking for a new job/career, a new house, etc., not to mention the upheaval for the kids, fills me dread.

I never used to give a 'fig' about things when I was younger - now, the thought of going outside my comfort zone leads me to cacking it.

Despite, talking/agreeing on this way forward -I've not changed my plans for this year on the plot.
I must be in the 'denial' period.

[Aberdeenplotter]

Crikey, pretty massive changes matey. I think I would be doing loads of research on job prospects and housing etc before committing. In fact, I would make sure I was walking into a job first.

[Lisasbolt]

Go for it, best thing i ever did was to get out of my comfort zone and take the plunge. We are so much happier

Maybe rent your house in the UK and rent somewhere over there and it all goes blue tits up you have got a fall back. I still rent out my house in the UK, nice to know i can always go back with a months or 2 notice.

One thing do not take it too seriously and enjoy the transformation.

[skeggijon]

Dunno about looking at new job opportunities - I'd be more concerned about the lotty

[cristalfiona]

My sister moved to Ireland as she met her current fiancé while over there doing her university work placement. They're getting married this year and quite honestly I could see the entire family ending up there within the next 10 years. Beautiful country, and though it's expensive for somethings, if you do your research then property and land are fairly cheap in comparison to the UK in most places

[PyreneesPlot]

My heart says go for it, although the head says be cautious

We moved in our early 40s but had been planning for nearly a decade before that. I would be nervous about moving without some kind of job or degree of financial security, especially with a family. What are the options if you (both) cannot find work?

We sold up in the UK to be able fund our lives here - we have peanuts to live on (sometimes two, when MrPP gets some work!) but it is enough, just, something we made absolutely sure of before committing.

I still think trying and maybe failing or hating it would be better than saying "what if" in years to come. Despite ill health making many of the things we came here precisely to do quite difficult, I have no regrets. We celebrate six years here on Friday.

[vixylix]

not quite as serious Kevin but we're planning on moving house in the summer and I've not changed my plans for the garden either

I think Lisa is spot on - hedge your bets so you know you have a fall back option and chances are you'll settle in and love it. No one likes change!

Good luck!

[Nicos]

We just walked away from our UK life with no plans at all.
OH had the promise of a job and this was our second home.
We thought we'd try living here for a while.

After a year we sold our UK home.
Been here nearly 8 years now.

Do I regret coming here?..nope not at all it's an absolutely delightful place.

Do I miss my family....absolutely ....and we keep in touch but don't get to see them as often as we'd like to.
We email/what's ap/skype/telephone very regularly...the world is shrinking

Money wise?..... wish we'd made some provision...as PP says- it's very hard living on the breadline.
It may be called the 'good life' but it's blinkin hard work trying to be as self sufficient as poss.

At least you won't be needing to learn a new language Kevin!

yep- go for it...you'll always wonder! The kids will make new friends

Oh...and apparently...if it's of any interest, there are many expats who can't cope with the French way of life/language who then move to Ireland for a very similar calmer life ( minus the croissants and wine of course )

[JanieB]

I made a huge mistake many years ago. My marriage was on it's way out and the next step up the career ladder was a 2 year stint in California. I decided to stay and try to mend my marriage.

Another very stupid consideration was that I didn't want my son to have an American accent. I have regretted my decision ever since.

I'm not comparing my situation to yours but a very good friend said "never wish you hadn't".

You can always come back.

[Potstubsdustbins]

^^^^^^^^Plenty off good advice above, what if is a question I would hate to ask myself.

I lived in southern Ireland for 6 months back in 1967 and had a great time.

One piece of advice I can give............. Don't ever that is....... never talk politics or religion with the locals it will end in tears.

[ancee]

Seven years ago we decided to move to Devon. Tried really hard for three years, had a business and made new friends, but just didn't like it. My mum and dad and brother and his family still live there. In the end I was so miserable we moved back to Doncaster. But that was the hardest move of all, financially. Still feel guilty about dragging the kids back and forth. But I don't regret coming back up north for an instant! Though I thought I hated it here! The grass isn't always greener, no matter how lovely it looks! Sometimes, holidays should stay holidays as its never quite the same when you live there

[veggiechicken]

Feel free to ignore me 'cos I'm a bit nutty
If I overthink a decision I don't do it. My best decisions have been spur of the moment ones and I've never regretted any of those. The ones I regret are the chances I didn't take.
Having said that, I don't know your circumstances - like how do the rest of your family feel about you moving? How would your wife/children feel if you don't go? I think you all need to agree, whatever the decision.

[Lumpy]

We moved from very urban London to very rural North Bedfordshire donkeys years ago and it took a lot to settle in as I assumed that both living enviroments would be the same as they were only 90 ish miles apart - wrong.

Areas seem to have different kinds of life let alone slang, food, jobs, schools activities etc.

Family will help you but can you rely on their constant initial support?

It is good that the replies on here will give you all aspects to think about but......none of us on here know how such a move will or will not affect you and your family.

If you consider everything on here you do, in my opinion run the risk of your brain turning into confused mush which will make an objective decision very difficult.

Either way Good Luck with whatever you decide.

[Nicos]

Very valid point about support Lumpy.

we have a handful of friends/family we keep in touch with from our earlier life.

When I used to write Xmas Cards we had over 200 peeps we regularly kept in contact with.
All - we thought- were very close.

Now I send about 20 cards to elderly relatives and maybe 20-30 emails to peeps we really value via the tinternet.

Constant support....?... probably less than 10 who would actively support us....and another 10 who would send supportive messages .

And nope- We're not Billies no mates...just being realistic tbh. (And yup- we have a few new 'friends' over here which fall outside that category )

....moving like this certainly concentrates the friends/ support/ realism

[WendyC]

We had an inspirational man come into school recently to talk to the children. He had overcome many difficulties in his life, including losing a limb. Two messages stood out for me, and I am very risk averse:
Don't be a What if person
How do you know you don't like something til you try it; say yes to everything.

Good luck!