Big Changes in Your Life ?

[KevinM67]

Thanks for such supportive comments - you really are great bunch on here.

Without boring you all with the background - my better half (who is Irish) has been pining to go back for a number of years now. She unfortunately lost her Father last year, therefore this has made her decision more determined now and pronto.

Anyway, her Mother wants us to move in with her initially as she's lonely and living in a large 4/5 bedroomed house. The rest of her family really want this too.
That has 'disaster waiting to happen' written all over it, doesn't it.

Job wise - I'd shovel sh!t to get by.

Family - my older girls are currently planning on which Uni they want to go to (results dependant), and Dublin has made them go YES, YES, YES. The obvious problem is that I might not be able to financially support them - they don't care.
My 7 year old doesn't want to lose his friends, but he's probably got just as many in Ireland (including cousins) as he's over there 5 times a year.

I said I wouldn't bore you

Right enough of my cr@p, I want to hear what big changes others have done, or not done....... that is a lot more interesting.

[veggiechicken]

Provided you can get along with your MiL, sounds ideal. Go for it, its an adventure

[Lisasbolt]

If you get along with the MIL, then why not test your feet. You could set it up over the summer time.

Ours was a boring story really, house prices crashed big time over here and we jumped on the waggon and bought a holiday home, we came out to pick up the keys and have a few weeks getting everything in order and we have never returned home....... that will be 3 years in March. I do not know if we will stay in Spain forever but i know i will not be living back in the UK, not for long anyway

Whatever you do, life is an adventure and you only live it once so enjoy it to the fullest you never know what is around the corner x

[Tripmeup]

Big decision Kevin, but you have been given lots of good advice here and if there is anything you want to know about specifics, then feel free to ask me ( although it sounds like you know plenty already😉 )

[KevinM67]

Big decision Kevin, but you have been given lots of good advice here and if there is anything you want to know about specifics, then feel free to ask me ( although it sounds like you know plenty already�� )

That is really generous. Cheers.

[Small pumpkin]

Go on, do it!
Me & the other half did it 6 years ago. We moved from Somerset to the isle of Mull. It hasn't all been plain sailing and it's one of the scariest things we've ever done! But I don't regret it for a second. We had a few friends up here ( locals we had met while on holiday ). We had a house to move into ( thanks to friends, letting us know when possible accommodation became available). This was quite tricky. As we moved from a 3 bedroom house to a 3 room house!
We quit our jobs a week before we moved. That gave us a week to pack up the house. We loaded up 2 cars and a trailer.
We didn't have any work lined up. We had no idea how we were going to pay rent or bills. Like I said scarey!
I love it here, I wouldn't change it for anything................
The only thing that would make me move from here is a much smaller island! ( so I can turn into the recluse I've always wanted to be )

[noviceveggrower]

Sorry a bit late joining in the conversation. My mom and dad made the jump from West Yorkshire up to north of Aberdeen. They decided to do their own version of the good life.
The place they found, well my dad, was a small house in the middle of no where with 3/4 of an acer of ground and about 1 mile from the nearest main road.
The family consisted of me, my mom and dad and Grandma. Plus two Burmese cats and a Labrador all packed in a small Austin Metro.
They didn't have any jobs they just winged it for the first few months until they found work.
I think everyone has given good advice, SP I am very envious of you, I would say go for it. You aren't moving to Australia and you can easily nip back to visit people. Plus there is always Skype for family members to chat with.
If you don't go you will never know.

[Elfeda]

well, around 4 years ago I decided to take a job in cambridge and resigned to my then employer.

when I really made a decision that I want to take this job OH was not really keen as it costs 5k extra for commuting to his client in London.but he was the one who got me convinced to attend the interview in cambridge as we were based in Croydon and unlikely to commute.

while his employer delayed the decision of supporting him to compensate his commuting expences to client / transfer him to their cambridge office.... we got a great offer that OH client got worried of losing him and offered a direct contract and in next 10 days he too resigned his job . and became a contractor of his dream job.


OH commuted 2 years to London which was hectic but now he became more independant and all the year 2015 ,he worked from home and got paid all extra hours etc.. now travelling 2 days a week on just to support the client who offered him first contract though.

all in all employers are happy to get him on WFH basis. so all in all it was brave and bold decision to leave the parmanent job where in contracting was not so common in his profession.

I have my 2 allotment plots at few meters away and still trying to convince my self not to think about a smallholding.

always worth it going out of comfort zone and live close to what you want to be.

[Alison]

The problem with things like this is that it depends totally on what your gut says. I'm a big fan of pro and cons lists. You don't have to go with the one with the longest list but the one which has the greatest value. In other words I could be weighing something up and have several pages which point me in one direction and the other with only one but if that one was big enough then I'd still go that way. I'm not really one much for making big decisions as I just go with the flow and don't get feelings of needing change that can't be solved with a few days away but I do know the things which are really important to me (good friends and the feeling of home) which I wouldn't want to lose for anything else. That's not to say I wouldn't move on at some point but I don't feel any need to do so. If I were to move I'd want to be sure that I could keep the things I treasured even if it meant adapting. Reading this back it looks like I'm very risk adverse but I suppose I'm just contented where I am for which I am very grateful.

[Bigmallly]

I jumped ship & took early retirement @ 56 y/o & moved 300 miles away. For me it was the right decision but everybody's' circumstances are different Kev & only you & your wife can make the decision which is right for your family. Good luck whichever route you take.

[Glutton4...]

As N!ke say: Just do it!

As VC said, if you over-think it, you'll talk yourself out of it.

Sounds like you get on fine with MiL, and if not, you can always work longer hours while she's still around

If it doesn't work, you can always move back.

My friend who moved to Spain 12 years ago is coming back, after Hubby chose his secretary over her. My sister is coming back after eight years of struggle. (Although, her lazy partner won't find it any easier back here with his attitude, but you didn't hear me say that!).

I've always fancied a big change, but health issues came while we were in the early planning stages, and now, four years into a new business, Hubby is settled, so we're staying.

[bramble]

Like everybody else, I would say, you dont want to look back with regret. The fact that you already have some place to live is a major plus.
The fact that your daughters want to make the move is another plus.
Your young 7 year old will make new friends and also have the oppertunity to get to know his cousins better.
Your wife will be a lot happier.
you will be living on the coast, and its beautiful in the summer.
The language is still the same.
The only worry is finding employment but perhaps your wifes family may be able to help.
I would say, go for it.

[Kirk]

Have a job in place before you go there. I always recall someone saying the classic "Money isn't everything," to which a reply of "No it isn't, but it is right up there with oxygen." came back.

Someone else saying Kevin will find a job easily is wishful thinking. You want cold hard truth. What if the cold hard truth is that at 50 you are going to find it difficult to get into anything, especially on the money you are half used to.

Retraining or jumping into something else is to a large extent not going to be a realistic option. I am afraid the practicalities and the rose tinted vision are somewhat different.

A visit to the place may be nice, sit round do little, enjoy the scenery, visit "quaint" towns, visit pubs and restaurants etc is one thing. Working and generally living elsewhere is so very different.

One other thing I have observed is that distance between yourself and relatives is often a good thing. My parents moved back "closer to home" (theirs not mine) and found they saw less of their family when closer then when we were five times the distance in seperation. And then being closer it was easier for them to fall out amongst each other.

[KevinM67]

I've not been on much because the move has practically taken over our life recently.

Family have moved- I'm still stuck here (which is bruta9).

Although looking forward to growing from Ireland

[Lumpy]

Kev - kiss the Blarney and chase a leprechaun for me when you get settled.

Good luck in your new life.