Tree Butchers

[DannyK]

Keep getting chaps on the knocker, two this week, alleging that they are tree surgeons. All are anxious to top my conifer.

One offered to remove the "weeds" from it. The said weeds are three nice clematises and a climbing rose! Another told me that the ivy would kill my copper beech.

These people are a menace.

[Martin H]

Murphy and Sean were walking through the woods when they came across a sign that said, "Tree Fellers Wanted". Sean says, "To be sure, it's a shame Paddy's not with us, we could have gone for that job."

I'll get me coat.

[Lumpy]

Their brothers knocked on the door yesterday after buying old jewellry e.g gold................bless!

I don't even habe a wedding ring let alone gold surplus to requirements

[muddled]

We get 'reformed' convicts.

Apparently encouraged by the police to sell me dishcloths as part of their rehabilitation....because, you know, the police always advise people to buy at the door don't they

I suspect though, that the six stone of Rhodesian ridgeback stood beside me as I open the door does more to keep them on the straight and narrow than selling dishcloths ever will

[skeggijon]

Wish they'd knocked on my door. I'm sure it would have cost less than the £2,500 my tree felling has cost me this week.