The Gardeners Rest #11 ( 2016)

[rary]

How can you have half a wee, rary, said VC in her usual confused way, though it may be best if you don't explain and instead.............

I have to explain VC, its a wee half, not a half wee, or to put it in to proper language, a wee hauf, which in this case if AP is paying that's in your language a half bottle of malt whisky, just to be sociable I would let AP pick the brand

[veggiechicken]

Knowing Ap he'd give you the top half of the half empty bottle, but since he'd be paying it's only right that.................

[rary]

Ha tries to avoid paying

[Jay22]

every time just the same as I try to avoid talking about the pantomime said rary. So this morning I...

[rary]

Am willing to discuss a pantomime if AP is willing to pay for a drink

[Lumpy]

Just as Rary finished speaking there was a flapping noise and a very elderly pigeon flew through the window, did a loop the loop and then crash landed into a bowl of peanuts on the bar.

As it was lying on its back with its legs in the air it was very easy to see that it had a small message tube tied to one knobbley leg.

Rary approached the comatose bird carefully in case it was booby trapped and snatched the message tube from the poor birds leg so hard he was left holding his arm out with the pigeon dandling on its jesse straps down by Rary's knees.................

After tucking the bird under his armpit Rary finally got to unroll the tiny piece of paper and started to read..................................he had not gone far when he turned an alarming shade of vivid green and then began to read out loud so everyone could hear him.

Dear Grapes,
As I stand here doing my bestest to balance in the circus ring for the amusement of the 2 people in the audience I was wondering if it was OK for me to come back...............I promise I.................

[Sheneval]

will ply rary with free drink over the festive period provided he stars as thr rear end of the Panto horse and do my best to get him the rear of the year award which he has been after for ..............

[Lumpy]

at least minutes........................where did that disembodied voice come from asked VC was it........

[veggiechicken]

..............the Ghost of Christmas past, the Barmaid who was last seen going down to the cellar with rary or did it come from the Tardis?............

[Lumpy]

Yoo Hoo squeeked.................

[Jay22]

a little voice. Oh it's Small Pumpkin back from doing her own cleaning for a change. You know she said, I am sick and tired of...

[Small pumpkin]

I'm sick & tired of the rubbish music. Can't we have some festive glam rock? As sp started to explain to all the very blank expression. The bar door opened and in came...........

[Lumpy]

Rary dressed as a Glam Rock god in silver wig, gold high calf trousers and a wig made from...............

[veggiechicken]

.........seaweed, collected at Troon by Shen and stinking of rotting fish (that's the seaweed, not Shen who uses .............

[rary]

His own home made comfry mix as an aftershave, as he reckons it will help his hair grow