Funny things that kids say!

[MrsC]

Any classics out there? Or when do you suddenly realise that your child knows a lot more than you think they do?

My son decided to share with me and a queue full of people in the local library the other day that the rather artistic pictures and cards of scantily dressed women/men "....were nothing compared to the underwear pictures in the Next catalogue! They were great fun and very rude!" Jaw fell open at this point!

Anyone out there who has got any wee gems?

[Seahorse]

When my first daughter was about 3, a relative bought her a Bertie Bassett (of Licorice Allsorts fame) toy. Unfortunately she had misheard his name and constantly referred to him as 'Dirty B*stard' It did encourage my then-OH and I to be more careful with our language though!

Claire

[Alice]

When my nephew was about 3 he sang along to- Living on Toast and Wine - ie Living on Tulsa Time.

[OverWyreGrower]

When my godson was about 4, we'd (mistakenly) let him watch Austin Powers, and he decided to burst into lines from the script in the supermarket: "Ah'm reet sexy, I am....."

He has also (at a Christmas party) saw a Westlife video and said "fat f*ck, fat f*ck, fat Brian".
His mum and dad were mortified and genuinely don't know where he got it from, as they're pretty careful with their language.

Unfortunately, we had to try and stifle the giggles and tell him that it wasn't very nice to say that about people....

[JennieAtkinson]

Why do they always manage to come out with their best in the supermarket?

[Shortie]

Last October we travelled across to Southern Ireland on the ferry. At 2am in the morning my little boy, who was WIDE awake decided he needed the toilet so I took him.

On the way to the toilet we passed a group of lads about my age and I tried to act a little bit 'cool' at which point Nathan decided to declare to anyone still awake that he needed a poo I hurried off very quickly after that

Oh, and at the moment the favourite embarrassment is when he thinks baby Bradley is hungry he asks (no matter where are) if he wants some 'booby milk'

[terrier]

When my OH's daughter was in infant school, she told OH that she had heard two of her friends at school discussing condoms "but they didn't know anything about them". OH asked her daughter if she knew what a condom was. Of course I do, she said, "they're huge birds with an 8 foot wingspan."

[cottage garden]

When my eldest son was one he just loved cars and was learning to count. On our walks out he used to point at every car and shout 'onecar'. No problem you might think but with his baby accent and saying it very quickly at every car that passed it unfortunately sounded like w**k**. Bless......

[zebedee]

One from my daughter when she was about 2 or 3, in a crowded shop (where else!!!!) when my wife and I were buying and discussing clothes. Because my wife was busy I dressed the little sweetheart, who then said in the shop at the top of her voice "Daddy got my knickers on this morning!"

The other from my middle son, when he was younger. He had a big kiddies meccano set with big plastic nuts and bolts and things. He was sitting in a shopping trolley, and asked what the key clip was held on with. I said 'little nuts'. You can probably guess what he came out with.

"I've got big nuts!"

[Farmer_Gyles]

had the kids in the car - heard police sirens - said to the kids "let's pretend we're the police .... woooo wooooo neeee naaaaaa neeee naaaa"
7 year old kiddy said "dad, lets just pretend we're normal people ........"
i've never been the same since

[zebedee]

had the kids in the car - heard police sirens - said to the kids "let's pretend we're the police .... woooo wooooo neeee naaaaaa neeee naaaa"
7 year old kiddy said "dad, lets just pretend we're normal people ........"
i've never been the same since

Children are great levellers, aren't they?

[bubblewrap]

A few (well a lot really)years ago My sister(now 43) on seeing a suit of armour in a shop asked her dad if that was what he wore during the war

[madderbat]

Our little darling (now 21) was delighted when McD opened in our town. He insisted, very loudly, in the street one day that he wanted 'bugger and sh1t' (can't think where he got the language from, but it seemed rather apt to me!)
He also coined one of my favourite words for his dinner - 'macrimony' which kind of combines all aspect of a failing marriage, don't you think?

[blossom]

Apparently when I was little my parents took me to London for my birthday. I had only ever seen black people on the TV so my Mum says she was rather worried when a black man sat opposite us on the underground and I was staring at him. She waited hoping I wouldn't say anything and then I said 'Mum.... Why has that man got such a bit nose?'. She says she didn't know whether to releaved or embarressed. LOL.

[Polly Fouracre]

An extract from my grandson's "busy-book".....and my Granny can walk through stinging nettles wearing just her bare legs.....no,don't even try to picture it!!!