HELP I Don't Want To Start a War

[rogesse]

Hi All

Forgive my rudeness (have yet to 'introduce' myself), but I really need some advice from you good people on a couple of 'allotment ettiquete' issues.

I took on an allotment last April (usual rubbish stewn, weed infested wasteland) and have got on with everyone (we're a mixed bunch)whilst avoiding the usual sniping and politics (and they say we women gossip.....). Well, it was a lovely day and I had the time so off I went adiggin only to be informed by a fellow allotmenteer that one of my neighbour's had been seen removing soil from my newly dug potato patch (a week ago) to his own! I thought we were getting on, especially after a council inspection on path alignment where he was reprimanded for land grabbing, but I said that the 5' he had already had off the bottom of my allotment was not a problem (I told him not to remove his fruit trees there, we would just tell the council they were mine). This guy has a bit of a reputation for removing things (particularly cabbage) of other plots.....
Worse was to come.Whilst I was chatting to the lovely man opposite me who was telling me his wife had installed a chemical toilet in his shed which I was free to use yet another neighbour came over and said 'talking of toilets'...apparently another allotmenteer - a woman no less - has been defecating (yes, thats right) on the corner of my plot where it meets the site fence
Should I go softly softly (especially on the first) or have the screaming abdabs and spark off an international inccident!

Please help - Jane

[Nicos]

Hello there!
Welcome to the Vine.
Do take a few moments to introduce yourself!

I'd tread softly for now - but I know a few Grapes wouldn't! So it's up to you.
Maybe you could ask the neighbours who witnessed the incidents to have a word with the offenders??

Don't be a pushover though......

[Two_Sheds]

Hi.
Tread carefully.
Is your source reliable? Is there evidence of these things happening? Have you found human faeces for instance?
Somebody could be winding you up, or trying to set you off against your neighbours. You get a lot of sh1t-stirrers on allotments, so don't believe everything you hear.

[janeyo]

Well hopefully it is all not true, if it is how disgusting (esp the pooing woman, yuk). But I think you need to make sure of everything before you wade in all guns (spades?!) blazing.

If it is true then am sure the people who manage the lotties can have a word. maybe you can rig up a dummy camera? They are only about a fiver on ebay for 2. This might be a deterrent for a little while, as they flash and move and everything and run on batteries.

Maybe keep a diary of any fresh disturbances as evidence and keep a look out for an poo - wear gloves of course!

janeyo

[jacob marley]

I would tread very softly especiallly in the corner by the fence if it is true what the woman has been doing a big shovel and return the evidence to her plot .
But when was you told all these tales of woe how close was it to APRIL THE 1st this may be the answer jacob

[rogesse]

Thank-you both

I trust the source for the 1st and as far as I know he has no axe to grind (he's only been there a year). Added to which the soil in question has been sorely depleted! The supposed offender does have a reputation but is regarded with indulgent affection by most, including me...... until this morning! I neglected to say I've left a stake with a sign saying "potatoes planted here" - it might be enough!

As to the 2nd - (it rather beggars belief) The source would seem reliable although I don't really know him (reliable in - a young teacher who has always been polite in passing). Honestly can't see why anybody would want to wind me up - fully paid up member of sitting on the fence, me! BUT we are a small site (30 in total and not all full plots) that was only 2/3 until recently. Strangely the latest arrivals (one of which is the accused)are viewed as new comers where as I seem to have been welcomed with open arms having taken up my plot all of 5 months before the 'interlopers'! You could be very right in terms of trouble making, but my gawd what an accusation!
I have seen scats or what I presume to be but blamed the allotment fox - he did bury a whole woodpidgeon in my raised strawberry bed (good larder...). I think I'll play Nancy Drew before going off the deep end.

Jane

[allotmentlady]

Contact your allotment officer and tell them about what has happened...... then maybe putting up a polite notice, no defecating in the area on the fence in question! I suggest that you approach the man who has alleged to have taken your soil and make it known to him, that your aware that someone is taking your soil, dont accuse him, but it should put him on notice.
I had someone like that on my old allotment, he even took my fence panels, so a polite letter shoved under his shed door, solved it!

[Magpie]

But when was you told all these tales of woe how close was it to APRIL THE 1st this may be the answer jacob

I think this is the answer he has a very good point

[rogesse]

Thanks all

Especially for the humour!!!

1st problem solved - the person who witnessed it had a 'word', 2nd one,IF it did happen, everyone is now aware....sorry for the rant!

[rustylady]

We don't have any toilets proper on our allotments, but I use a bucket inside my shed (and that's only for wees). I certainly wouldn't relieve myself in the open, and certainly not on someone else's plot. However, going on from that - wouldn't it be good if every allotment site had to have toilet facilities?

[rogesse]

Rustylady

I got hubby to erect a shed for the sole purpose of housing a bucket......................
(wees only)