help new neighbours!!!!

[SAFIA]

i got my allotment last november and love it even though its over grown etc i chose it cos its near the gate and the loo (handy for my 3 year old) and as there was a helpful chap on 1 side and 2 overgrown plots on the other but i thought cos they were next to the gate noone would take them wrong!!! a chap has taken the 1 next to the gate so there is a plot in between us and he is pleasent enough but his family are terrible they all shout and swear (including the kids)are noisy and wander over to my plot constantly the kids always bring along a football which naturally ends up in amongst my loveling grown plants(well mainly weeds) i had my 2 little ones with me on wednesday plus my mum and dad and all we could here was their youngsters fing and blinding i had to ask them to keep the langauage down but it didnt really help, its beginning to updset me so do i wait untill the novelty has worn off for the family or complain now?? please help

[dinky_doo]

personally i would have a quiet word in the chaps ear when he's alone just ask him if he could keep his kids in line.if the problem still occurs speak directly to the site manager.

i dont really see my 4 neighbours i see one old boy on a sunday andthe others i havnt seen for over 6 months each and when i do they dont even say hello or any thing they even turned down a brew and a biccy
all the best

[SAFIA]

to be honest the way his sons talk to him i dont think there is anything he could except not bring them(fingers crossed) they really disrespect him and talk to him like dirt and they arent even in double figures yet!
everyone else is great really friendly and chatty i keep getting gifts eg plants veg eggs etc so no complaints there they even stop me in the street to chat and the chap himself is really nice but when i say the rest of the family a dregs i really mean it
i guess i will have a word and hope that once the novelty wears off they will all stop coming down so often

[Norm]

How about nailing one of the kids to the shed, explaining it's some obscure religious practice and if the other kids don't bahave, there will be another festival next week

[sallyw]

i think that if it carries on i would have a quiet word with the allotment society our site is very laid back and they dont seem to have many rules but they do stipulate to respect other plotholders and if they're being a nuisance you should have reason to complain esp if they're damaging your plants, to be honest i go to the allotment for a bit of peace and quiet, i would be really hacked off if i had the hassle. good luck with it though!!

[Nicos]

Site manager is the way to go...............once they hear/see what's going on they would want to do something about it.
Good luck!

[Pootle]

We don't have this problem on our site as all of the children seem really well behaved - although the very first thing one plot holder said to me was a warning about making sure my girls didn't go on other plots! I've since found out that the woman in question is always full of doom and gloom, so I'm not taking it as a personal insult!

However, I can't imagine any plot holder letting their children loose with a football on site - the potential for damage is just too great and I'm sure that even if its not in the terms of your tenancy agreement there would be an understanding that footballs were a no-no.

As for the swearing - I'm with you on this one. I'm no prude but don't swear myself and cringe whenever we are in the company of those who do. I don't want my girls to think that its acceptable to pepper their speech with swear words. It seems that its such an ingrained habit in some people that they can no longer temper their language according to the audience around them. Phew...Rant over

It sounds as though the new plot holder might be a reasonable guy - perhaps a quiet word would work before going to the allotment secretary. You may find that his children have behavioural problems which might explain the lack of understanding and although its no excuse it would at least give him the opportunity to explain what's going on before making the situation too serious...

[yoanbob]

Good luck what ever you do, sounds terrible.

[SAFIA]

Thank you all, just a quick update i went to the plot the other evening and my heart sank when i saw the kids but i have to say when they did start shouting and swearing their dad was telling them off cos the lady was here which i guess is a start i also found out from 1 of the other allotmenteers that he is a single parent of 4 boys (which i have full respeect for)so it sounds like theres a lack of female influence perhaps? i shall just just plod on for a bit longer and hope it sorts its self out if not i will go with norms idea and nail them to the shed!!!!!

[Novice Gardener]

What about asking the lads to give you a hand in return for a nice cold drink, maybe that'll help them respect you plot a bit more?

[SAFIA]

good thinking novice the thought had cossed my mind will give it a try

[CarolineW]

Let us know how it all pans out for you Safia - I really feel for you and hope that it all works out in the end.

[rainbowminx]

Regarding the playing football and straying onto other people's plots, I would speak to the allotment people. For the foul language I would speak to the adult in charge of the kids and calmly explain that it is out of order and that I don't expect to hear it even once more in the presence of my children. It is actually a criminal offence to use foul language in a public place - for which the foul language users could be arrested, charged or fined (yes, even the children if they are over 10). I would be tempted to remind them of this should it go on.

Of course, it's a delicate balance between keeping people happy, getting along with people and tolerating other people's differences, but having to 'suffer' bad behaviour and language is not acceptable at all and I certainly wouldn't accept it. I would always appeal to someone's better nature with a quiet chat, but if this fails you do have the law on your side!

Kris

[chuffa]

How about nailing one of the kids to the shed, explaining it's some obscure religious practice and if the other kids don't bahave, there will be another festival next week

Nice one Norm

[snohare]

Steady on Norm, you don't want to damage the shed !